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The Accountant’s Guide to Taking Down an Evil Vampire Lord (and maybe bagging Astarion while you are at it) by Cinnamontails
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
07 Nov 2024
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Summary
“Fine,” she said. “Do you know the statistically most common way for the authorities to take out organized crime?”
Well, if that was her idea of enticing conversation, it was no wonder she had all those evenings free to chase after scoundrels like him. Still, Astarion didn’t want to antagonize her further and ruin the game, so he pursed his lips and guessed, “A very large, well-placed cannon?”
“Tax fraud.”
She looked at him as if she expected some sort of reaction – maybe a dramatic gasp? A palm flung to his forehead in a theatrical rendition of How could I not think of this?
Everything he could muster was a blink. “Tax … fraud.”
She nodded, obviously excited about what Astarion was sure were two of the most boring words in the English language, combined.
"That's how we'll take down Cazador."- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 112,858
- Chapters:
- 26/26
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- 1
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- 2,005
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- 5,199
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Bookmarked by Stinarina
10 Dec 2023
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“Oh, gods forbid they respond positively to you doing a good thing,” Neve deadpans. She squeezes him a little again. “That’s sort of how it works, Astarion.”
She can’t even see it. Believes the best of them all so earnestly, himself included, that she can’t see how it would all fall away without her at the center. It’s enough to make a person feel like they might actually deserve it.
“And by it, you mean…?” he asks instead.
Her huffed laugh of disbelief ruffles the hair at his neck. “Friendship, you idiot,” she answers. “And the general acquisition thereof.”
Astarion cuts a sideways look at her as best he can with her still nestled so close. “And is that what we are? Friends?”
He’d meant it to tease her, and yet finds that the silence before her answer twists his stomach. Because…he doesn’t actually know, either.
“Yes, Astarion,” Neve says gently, after a moment. “I think we’re very good friends.”
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Neve and Astarion, continued. She's not a victim. Not a target. Not just one night it's better to forget. But then...whatever in the world could she be?
Series
- Part 2 of Mercurial World
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 96,994
- Chapters:
- 17/?
- Comments:
- 1,068
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- 6,030
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- 1,459
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Bookmarked by Stinarina
10 Dec 2023
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Summary
Six years after the Battle of Hogwarts, Auror Hermione Granger activated a mysterious dark object, which unexpectedly sent her decades into the past.
Tom Riddle, now known as Voldemort, returned to British wizarding society in 1966 after a decade-long absence. Under the guise of interviewing for the Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position, he arrived at Hogwarts to conceal one of his Horcruxes. But he soon discovered that the coveted position had been stolen a week earlier by an intriguing witch.
As manipulative schemes emerged, tension evolved into a ruinous obsession.
Illustrated and beta read by Nurchie.
Tom Riddle Main Theme composed by #LastDay.
Podfic and Russian translation available.
This fic has been rewritten.
Chapter 12 - Defense Against Mercy II: Guillotine is now posted.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,751
- Chapters:
- 54/?
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- 35
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- 8,856
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Bookmarked by Stinarina
28 Apr 2023
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Summary
Hermione goes back in time to kill Voldemort before he orchestrates a devastating war, her destination being the Battle of Hogwarts. Instead she lands in 1944, where she catches the attention of a young Tom Riddle. They begin exchanging letters and the occasional body part.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 173,777
- Chapters:
- 46/46
- Collections:
- 14
- Comments:
- 2,648
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- 5,402
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- 1,818
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Bookmarked by Stinarina
28 Apr 2023
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Summary
Nevina (Nevi) Moore was perfectly happy with her life. Going on digs, working at the Cairo Museum, spending evenings with her siblings, Evie and Jonathan. A dig to the legendary city of Hamunaptra should have been another routine adventure... should have been. Now she's stuck with an ancient evil mummy who thinks she's the one who put him in the grave and wants to kill her sister, a Medjai who has dreamy eyes despite continually trying to kill her and her friends, and a past life that really could have stayed buried. Along with that fucking mummy. But, it is what it is, so now she gets to deal with all that.
Series
- Part 1 of Fairytales & Hokum
Bookmarked by Stinarina
29 Nov 2021
