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Kitchen War by fullmetalpotterhead
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
19 Jan 2023
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Summary
Sometimes love is an ass slap in the kitchen, you know?
(Can be read independently from other oneshots in this series)
Series
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swallow my fable (that I was not enough) by darkestmagic
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 天官赐福 | Heaven Official's Blessing (Cartoon)
06 Jul 2025
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Summary
Xie Lian doesn’t remember falling asleep in the woods.
If he really was teleported here without his knowledge or consent, Xie Lian figures he ought to find out why. He thickens his skin and mentally recites the password to Hua Cheng’s communication array; and if his ears turn a bit red at saying the words, then at least there’s no one around to see. San Lang, he calls out, are you there?
The silence that follows his question feels decidedly heavy, but with what, Xie Lian isn’t sure. Then comes Hua Cheng’s answer, flat and icy as a frost-covered lake: Who the fuck is this, and how do you have my array password?
Xie Lian raises his palms in an instinctual gesture of surrender, but of course Hua Cheng can’t see him. San Lang, it’s me, he replies, alarmed.
A beat. You have three seconds to answer me, or I’ll bombard your head with such a frightening sound your brain leaks out your ears, Hua Cheng snarls.
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A Night Like This by kianspo
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 天官赐福 | Heaven Official's Blessing (Cartoon)
15 Oct 2024
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Summary
Xie Lian, prompted by some well-meaning friends, decides to try a one-night stand to prove he knows how to have fun. All Hua Cheng hopes for is a phone number. So when Xie Lian says, essentially, 'your place or mine?' Hua Cheng promptly loses what little is left of his mind.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,558
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 134
- Kudos:
- 2,788
- Bookmarks:
- 613
- Hits:
- 16,411
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
08 Feb 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Soft, sweet, heartbreakingly in love ugh fuck these guys i love them hhhhh
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A Long and Slow Recovery by ardenrabbit
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
26 Dec 2024
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Summary
The light still doesn't make sense against his eyes, but he thinks he remembers something like color. There is a lot of color around him, and he is able to discern white and black and a great deal of something else. It's a breathtaking splash of vivacity on a new canvas, where there had been no canvas at all for so many eternities. It is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.
Red, Xie Lian finally names it.
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In a disorienting turn of luck, Xie Lian is rescued from State Preceptor Fangxin's coffin. He recovers his other senses in good time, but his sight is taking longer to return—decades with no exposure to light have weakened his capacity for it.
His benefactor and worshiper, a wealthy and eccentric ghost named Hua Cheng, hasn't left his side for months.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 151,947
- Chapters:
- 25/?
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 4,415
- Kudos:
- 10,491
- Bookmarks:
- 3,016
- Hits:
- 313,296
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
25 Oct 2024
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“I feel like I see echoes of you everywhere in this city. Or perhaps I see echoes of it in you.”
[contains 6.0 Endwalker spoilers (level 84)]
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
07 Jul 2024
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Summary
"Sometimes you don’t have the luxury of decades." He eyed G’raha. "Or the burden."
[contains 6.0 Endwalker spoilers (level 90)]
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Summary
"Welcome to a new user experience! You have triggered this interface with the keywords, ‘Stupid game! Stupid devs! I want my f*****g money back!’ You are now bound to the character Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, codename: Childe! We hope you have an enjoyable user experience and we welcome you once again to Genshin Impact 2.0!”
Those are some of the first words Ajax, starving college student extraordinaire, has the misfortune of hearing upon waking up in a brave new world from what he's fairly sure is a very fatal accident involving water and a shit ton of electricity.
Okay, so he's not dead. That's good. But what's this about him being stuck playing the character Tartaglia? Tartaglia, as in the no-good, one-dimensional, cartoonish villain who met his untimely, gruesome death in the first act of the original game?
Forget this. Like hell Ajax is going to share that fate.
And so begins one man's journey to save himself from his awful destiny.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 559,991
- Chapters:
- 46/46
- Collections:
- 56
- Comments:
- 29,291
- Kudos:
- 46,920
- Bookmarks:
- 7,565
- Hits:
- 2,116,886
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
13 Sep 2023
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To Kaveh’s great shock and utter dismay, no one else seemed to know that Al-Haitham had dimples except him.
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
19 Aug 2023
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sunshine all the time makes a desert by summer_son
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
27 Nov 2022
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Summary
Alhaitham can tolerate Kaveh being his roommate to a degree.
But sharing a tent and sleeping bag with him while being trapped in the desert during a sandstorm?
Archons, he's not gonna make it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,204
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 131
- Kudos:
- 3,950
- Bookmarks:
- 499
- Hits:
- 53,991
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
21 Feb 2023
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Summary
Kaveh used to think that Alhaitham had mastered the art of ignoring him. The man would remain unflappable as he continued to read his worn copy of The Origins of Enkanomiyan Language, even when Kaveh was a hair’s breadth away from shattering the windows of their house with his severity of pitch.
No amount of screaming, threats to throw things, or violently waving in front of him could get Alhaitham to pause in his thirst for knowledge. As it turns out, Alhaitham literally just turns his hearing aids off so he doesn’t have to listen to Kaveh.
It’s for this exact reason that Kaveh has decided to learn Sumerian Sign Language.
or,
Kaveh learns sign language just to continue bickering with Alhaitham.
Series
- Part 1 of Deaf!Alhaitham
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,210
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 22
- Comments:
- 400
- Kudos:
- 23,443
- Bookmarks:
- 4,271
- Hits:
- 222,803
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
16 Feb 2023
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Lover of the Emperor, Enemy of the State by equinoctial
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
27 Oct 2022
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Summary
Many have flocked to Liyue to try their hand at conquering Rex Lapis’ Path of Indomitable Jade, rumoured to be relentless in its challenge but bountiful in its reward. Unsurprisingly, Ajax’s one track mind honed in on the word challenge and ran all the way to Celestia with it.
No one told him it was a bygone tradition that vied for the emperor’s hand in marriage, not until much later, when Liyue was already decked to the nines in preparation for the coronation of the emperor’s beloved consort– an Ajax-shaped consort.
(In which a bored Childe thinks he’s scaling up mountains to fight adepti and gain bountiful gifts for his nation and all that jazz, but he actually ends up wooing one of them and fighting favour from the rest and-- uh, wait, what do you mean the eccentric rock enthusiast is the emperor--)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 113,938
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 856
- Kudos:
- 7,096
- Bookmarks:
- 1,787
- Hits:
- 154,422
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
03 Sep 2022
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On Our Way to Fall by etymologyplayground
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
09 Jan 2019
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Summary
As he rounds the corner to the front of Puji Shrine, he's taken aback to see Nan Feng standing outside the shrine's open door with his sword drawn. "Nan Feng?" he calls, and Nan Feng jumps.
"Oh!" he says, recognizing Xie Lian. "There you are! Your highness, you shouldn't enter — there's a demon inside!"
Xie Lian frowns at him. "I'm aware," he says. "He stayed the night."
--
Xie Lian and Hua Cheng talk things out a little.
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The Courting Habits of the Red Fox: A Scientific Lecture by avtorSola
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
27 Feb 2022
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Summary
Common Courting Habits of the Red Fox (Vulpes vulpes):
1) Increased vocalization: Red foxes become especially chatty, barking and yipping much more often in order to attract potential mates
2) Resource offerings: Red foxes will assist mates in locating a suitable den in which to have kits, or will provide food to their mate and assist with hunting
3) Increased scent-marking: Male red foxes will become extremely interested in the scent markings made by potential mates, investigating each one diligently. Female red foxes may also leave more scent markings at the beginning of mating season.4) They become increasingly clingy Harbinger brats and you're dense, Zhongli. Thank god Lumine has Teyvat's braincell.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,475
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 36
- Kudos:
- 2,584
- Bookmarks:
- 399
- Hits:
- 17,424
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
20 Jun 2022
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Summary
Child goes very still. “Teucer,” he says, “Did you tell Diluc where you were going before you got on the boat? Or Tonia, or Anthon? Anyone who might report to him?”
“Um… No? I just sort of got on it.”
“Oh dear,” says Childe.
Series
- Part 1 of Daybreak on the Blue
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,095
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 33
- Kudos:
- 1,805
- Bookmarks:
- 271
- Hits:
- 15,723
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
20 May 2022
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Summary
After a battle with La Signora over the gnosis, Childe awakes in a strange room surrounded by the people he knows but really doesn’t.
“What’s that glowing chess piece anyway?” snaps Xiao.
“...Fuck.” says Childe eloquently.Or, the gnosis transports Childe into a modern version of their world where gods, adepti and monsters certainly do NOT exist.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,421
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 556
- Kudos:
- 3,290
- Bookmarks:
- 387
- Hits:
- 49,775
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
10 May 2022
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Summary
"So," Aether says, "the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui wants to ask you for love advice."
Venti says, "what?"
Series
- Part 3 of Gwen's Magic 8 Ball (Genshin)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,625
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 9
- Comments:
- 979
- Kudos:
- 6,903
- Bookmarks:
- 1,276
- Hits:
- 90,076
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
06 May 2022
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Summary
Scaramouche can’t be attracted to Childe. It’s Childe, for crying out loud. Stupid, asshole Childe with his idiot blue eyes and warm smile, and those big hands and… Fuck, he is attracted to Childe. He’s attracted to a ginger. That’s so embarrassing.
Series
- Part 1 of Streamer Childe Supremacy
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 23,265
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 363
- Kudos:
- 9,220
- Bookmarks:
- 1,540
- Hits:
- 134,373
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
01 May 2022
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Summary
{ Contains all works relating to Genshin Impact that fit into no other series category. }
- Words:
- 20,041
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 113
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
30 Apr 2022
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What I Cannot Put into Words, I Offer You in the Weight of Gold by suibianitsfine
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
27 Feb 2022
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Summary
“You’re not…” Childe’s head may have been angled like a baffled puppy, but he couldn’t help it, “Put off by all of that?”
As the disk of orange dipped below the Liyuan waters and the twilight sky remained illuminated by dusky remnants of what had been, Zhongli’s golden-edged features took on a radiance of their own. It wasn’t the lights playing tricks on him when Childe saw the man’s eyes gleam, and he craved to know what that meant.
“Perhaps I give you too much credit.” He was smiling, now, and Childe’s breath caught in his throat. That was certainly new. “Maybe you do not listen as much as I thought you do.”
Childe processes just how different Rex Lapis, God of Contracts, and Zhongli, Wangsheng Funeral Consultant, really are.
They coincide at the worst of times, and it does some truly awful things to his heart.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 187,555
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 3,093
- Kudos:
- 8,400
- Bookmarks:
- 2,038
- Hits:
- 276,245
Bookmarked by WindowFenetre
08 Apr 2022