Zacbunny
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Arthur could see his father glaring down - face red and eyes narrowed as he looked at Merlin with clear distaste.
"Once this over, sorcerer...I’ll burn you."
"You’ve already tried that," Merlin’s voice answered and Arthur had to bite his fist to keep from making any noise. “You need to accept you can’t kill me… Hand me that blanket, please.”
“I’m sure there must be some method… Beheading?”
“No, we tried that.”
“Hanging?”
“I just sort of... Swung there, remember?”
There was another pause.
“I should have made you keep that dragon below the castle so I could feed you to it.”
“Kilgharrah? He won’t eat me, but if you want to torture me than making me listen to his nonsense for an hour might do it.” Merlin said and there was a soft sigh from the other end of the room. “I’m glad you agreed to help me though. Usually I have to do the grunt work of saving Arthur myself.”
“I can’t wait to kill you.”
Or
Uther finds out about Merlin’s magic, but can’t seem to kill him. Merlin is just trying to protect Arthur. They become a begrudgingly effective duo. Arthur doesn't understand why they think he isn't noticing this.
Series
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Bookmarked by Zacbunny
08 Jan 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
Fucking hilarious, had to pause multiple times to read. I wanna see more of merlin being a menis to other and their reluctant alliance XD
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Cruelly Murdered, Falsely Accused, and Deserving Death by The_duke_is_back
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
31 Dec 2022
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Shen Yuan dies and transmigrates into PIDW.
Only, he's not Shen Qingqiu.
He's not a peak lord.
Hell, he's not even a disciple.
He's a random kid in a very dangerous world.Luckily, he meets someone trustworthy very quickly! Thank heavens for knowing characters who end up around Luo Binghe later, amiright?
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you don't need poltergeists for sidekicks by nyoomerr
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
13 Jun 2021
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In which Shen Yuan goes poking around the ruins of an old castle and ends up haunted by the ghost of Luo Binghe, demon emperor extraordinaire...
.. and Shen Yuan thinks the whole "being haunted" thing is fantastic, thank you very much.
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Oversharing is Caring by Prudabaga
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
20 Mar 2024
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"And that," Shen Qingqiu said, his voice steady as he concluded his argument, "is why Liu Qingge is only the third prettiest person on Cang Qiong, after Luo Binghe and presumably Liu Mingyuan, but before Yue Qingyuan. Sorry, Zhangmen-shixiong."
"That's alright," Yue Qingyuan said in a strangled voice.
"It comes down to his ass."
"Yes, you've already said as much, shidi. Several times." Yue Qingyuan looked like he wanted to die a little bit, which was unfair. He wasn't the one who'd been dosed with a wife-plot potion designed to lower inhibitions while also compelling the truth! If anyone here should be embarrassed, it was Shen Qingqiu!
He didn't feel embarrassed, though. That was probably due to the potion, now that he thought about it.