offsammich
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Recent works
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[PODFIC] Hitting the High C's by Baby_kraken, bewareofitalics, Cait_does_Podfics, chokedbyanangel (little_seahorse), Djapchan, Ecchima, florence_pods (florence_after_midnight), fullofhope137, LoopyDangerFrog, Meomyr Pods (Meomyr), offsammich, PilotPiratePods, TillyChMo, vexbatch pods (vexbatch), with (cheesecake3), with (Literarion), with (Tipsy_Kitty) for bewareofitalics
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
18 Aug 2025
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Summary
High school drama star Edward Teach is ready to give up on acting, until he meets a transfer student doing something new: a musical.
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Podfuckery: Endings & Beginnings by offsammich, Yourgentlemanpirate
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
25 Dec 2024
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Summary
What would happen if a crew of Podficcers were to record the same story, each in their own style? The start and finish of the fics are all the same, but we’ve teamed up with a crew of writers to give you something a little different in the middle.
This is the Podfuckery narrated by yourgentlemanpirate and written by offsammich.
Series
- Part 18 of Podfuckery 2024
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Podfuckery: The Corpse Tripped at Midnight by offsammich, smallestchurch
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
01 Dec 2024
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Summary
There’s a Podfuckery afoot!
What would happen if a crew of Podficcers were to record the same story, each in their own style? The start and finish of the fics are all the same, but we’ve teamed up with a crew of writers to give you something a little different in the middle.
This is The Podfuckery narrated by offsammich and written by smallestchurch.
Series
- Part 3 of Podfuckery 2024
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Summary
In which Ed and Stede and their (!) ten (!!) dogs take an unhinged and perhaps ill-advised roadtrip in a dog bus.
Series
- Part 2 of assorted dog jobs extended universe
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The office hosts a baby shower.
(An Office AU written for the AUgust day 5 prompt: Any TV Show)
Recent series
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Podfuckery 2024 by 1happydaiz, adhduck, Baby_kraken, bizarrelittlemew, caribbeancrocs, cheesecake3, cheesecake3pods (cheesecake3), ClaireGregory, cochineal, darcylindbergh, Deanbird, depressionrobe, elky, emi_rose, fullofhope137, Gemagination, ghostalservice, happydaiz_pod (1happydaiz), Judysoranges, Kninjaknitter, littlefingies, LoopyDangerFrog, LyndziM, nomadsland, offsammich, Permanent_Ink, petrichorca, PilotPiratePods, SD_Ryan, shipmates, smallestchurch, Tipsy_Kitty, tragicallynerdy, veeagainst, with (cheesecake3), with (Tipsy_Kitty), xoxoemynn, YellowMustard, yerbamansa, Yourgentlemanpirate
Fandom Our Flag Means Death (TV)
01 Jan 2025
Summary
It's a PODFUCKERY!
a group of authors have all taken the same beginning and end of a story and filled in their own delicious middles.... and they don't know who's going to be narrating them!
A group of podficcers have each been given a story to narrate.... and they don't know who wrote them!
Join us through the month of December as we take a journey through nearly 40 different creators!
Hosted by 1happydaiz, BabyKraken, and ghostalservice!
- Words:
- 31,394
- Works:
- 21
- Bookmarks:
- 12
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- Words:
- 19,867
- Works:
- 2
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- Words:
- 86,722
- Works:
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- Bookmarks:
- 44
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Ed moved to this small, nowhere bit of beach town to get away from his life and get back in touch with himself— whoever the fuck that is, anyways— so the absolute very last thing he ever expects to see in his local-turned-personal-favorite hole in the wall pub is his ex husband.
Or for said ex husband to come up to him to say hi, talk, and catch up.
Fuck.
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There's something Ed wants to try. Stede has... concerns.
Bookmarked by offsammich
04 Jul 2025
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Stede asks Ed to help educate him on pirate sexual relationships, as "co-captains".
Ed says yes.
This is a great idea and no one has any problems or unexpressed feelings.
And then they fuck.
Bookmarked by offsammich
07 Jun 2025
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Stede has always been Ed’s.
Well, technically, there was the brief pointless time before he’d met her. But as much as Stede cared to remember, as much as he found worth considering, as long as Stede had been anyone, he’d been Ed’s.
Certainly not romantically.
With her the crown princess, and he a simple knight, certainly not.
But still.
He was hers.Bookmarked by offsammich
31 May 2025
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Summary
Ed crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged, casual. “It’s just bodies, Stede. They’re weird. They do stuff sometimes.”
Stede peered up at him cautiously. “Yeah?”
“What, you think you’re the first person who’s ever gotten a boner during a physical?” Ed scoffed. “Hate to break it to you, but you’re not special.”
Granted, no one Ed had treated had ever had an orgasm while Ed’s finger was still inside them but that was neither here nor there.
**
Stede comes in for his annual prostate exam. Things do not go as planned.
Based on that tweet that's like "if y'all having a bad day just letting y'all know my co-worker got his prostate exam and when the doc touched his prostate he nutted immediately and fell down knocking over some equipment"
Bookmarked by offsammich
15 May 2025