thatloserboycharm



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya in 2014 had no idea his time with Hollander was so limited — something that Ilya in 2016 knows all too well.

    Ilya in 2016 is also playing hockey like shit. The version of himself on the television misses an easy shot, and the commentators tear him apart for it. Ilya, watching from his bed, is inclined to agree with them. His father’s decline is almost a blessing this month, when his usual level of vitriol would be for once so entirely deserved.

    He’s thinking about all of this, beer in hand, when there’s a knock on his door.

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    15 Dec 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    ep4 coda. what if they ripped the bandaid off and talked. actually talked

  2. Public Bookmark 67

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    Ilya says his name like he’s taking communion. His pretty mouth wrapping around the whole syllable the same way he sucks Shane’s cock: with reverence.

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    15 Dec 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    metaphors that bloom

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    When Eddie learns he and Buck got drunk-married at Chimney’s bachelor party, he goes on a metaphorical journey to figure out the best way to be a good husband.

    “Now you get it. Damage done. We didn’t know,” Buck shrugs, “now we do, so we can just …”
    Eddie’s mind races to finish Buck’s sentence:
    Park our cars side-by-side in my driveway forever.
    Hang all our clothes in the same closet so I have better access to that blue hoodie I love.
    Kiss.
    “… get an annulment.”
    “What?” The word slips out of Eddie’s mouth before he can stop it.
    Buck frowns.
    “You want to …” Eddie drops his fork to his plate. He’s suddenly not hungry, despite how much he loves Buck’s omelets. His voice wobbles when he adds, “You don’t want to be married to me?”

    Language:
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    23 Oct 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    studying Eddie Diaz's brain under a microscope

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    The kid staring at him across the bar is young, Hawaiian shirt and blue board shorts, aviators pinned to a thin white undershirt, the V of his crooked collar showing a light smattering of freckles over sun-kissed clavicles. Probably some navy admiral's rebellious kid looking for a good time. Maverick's gone through his fair share of them way back when. This one is at least a decade too young for Maverick's current tastes. That ridiculous old-school mustache he's got going on does nothing to hide the signs of youth in the rest of his body — smooth supple skin and the effortless muscle that Maverick has to work hard to keep at his age.

    "Like what you see?" Maverick says in way of greeting. It's a lot more straightforward than his usual pickup lines, but he's four drinks in and itching to be bent over some flat surface and fucked hard.

    Something that looks like disbelief flits over the kid's face, then his expression smooths out once more, hardens.

    He opens his mouth and it's a man's voice that says, "Yeah, I do."

    Companion Piece: This Empty Love

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    16 Aug 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “I just feel…” Eddie starts, and then he’s shaking his head and blowing out a stiff breath, rubbing at his brow. “I don’t know, man. I need to get out of my head. It’s not a good place to be right now.”

    Buck hums. Lightheartedly, he says, “I could always spank you again.”

    Eddie chokes on his water where he was mid-sip, snorting and coughing around his own laughter. “Yeah, absolutely,” he says sarcastically, shoving at Buck playfully. “It worked so well last time.”

    Their eyes meet, and a wave of energy shocks its way through Buck’s body. Not like a lightning strike; more like an electric fence, pulsing through his fingertips and dissipating in his chest, fizzling out into his ribcage.

    “Well, it kinda did,” Buck croaks, throat aching and dry again already.
    -----
    Eddie’s been having a tough time since Christopher left. Buck offers an unorthodox solution.

    Language:
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    30 Jul 2025

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