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with tears in my eyes, i begged you to stay. (you said, "hey man, i love you, but no fucking way.") by zashizawa
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
04 Nov 2022
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Summary
But, in front of all of that, he just gets—mad.
At the world, at his parents, at his sister, but mostly—at himself.
Because he knows that if he showed Maddie the fingerprint bruises hidden beneath his sleeves, she would've taken him with her when she ran away from home at twenty-one.
(Or, Maddie leaves first, the Buckley parents were abusive, and nobody knows.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,933
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 50
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- 4,765
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- 657
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Bookmarked by theneiljosteneffect
26 Feb 2026
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Summary
Eddie wakes up five years in the future. It turns out five years is all it takes to ruin a friendship and run your life into the ground.
Or, Eddie gets hurt and his apparently now ex-best friend Buck hops on a plane to El Paso. They figure out what the fuck happened together.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,025
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 200
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- 3,301
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- 615
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- 23,056
Bookmarked by theneiljosteneffect
23 Feb 2026
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Summary
“They just follow it around, copying it and helping it and bothering it so much that it's like, worn down into loving the duckling back and looking out for it.”
“So,” said Eddie, furrowing his brow. “In this scenario, you are—”
“A baby duckling, newly hatched into the world with no idea what’s going on.”
“And I am—”
“The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes.”
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Eddie has no idea how to cope when a temporary case of amnesia causes the return of Buck 1.0. Buck has no clue why his future self hasn't made the moves on his hot best friend. It all goes pretty well, considering.
Series
- Part 1 of make way for Buckling
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,226
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 505
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- 12,371
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- 2,901
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- 128,810
Bookmarked by theneiljosteneffect
20 Feb 2026
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Summary
A process is recursive when it defines or contains itself; e.g., the Fibonacci sequence, which determines the next number as the sum of the previous two.
But not all recursive processes are mathematical. Recursion can happen in a temporal context when, for instance, the powerful magical force that is true love drags you back in time so it can create itself, endangering the fate of the Wizarding World—not to mention the very fabric of space and time—along the way.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 132,526
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Comments:
- 2,572
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- 17,234
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- 5,872
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- 415,041
Bookmarked by theneiljosteneffect
05 Jan 2025
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Bookmarker's Notes
“Maybe this timeline, this universe, was the way it was always meant to be.”
10/10
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Tags
Summary
From there, it becomes a thing. At least once a day, either Christopher or Buck declare that a mild inconvenience is a part of the anti-gay agenda.
They hit every red light? During pride month? Homophobic.
The hot water stops working? In June? Homophobic.
Or, Eddie doesn't think he really needs to come out to anyone. Christopher adopts a new catchphrase. Buck is confused.

