Work Text:
i.
The first time it happens is the second day of ninth grade.
Garrett spots the new kid right away—he sticks out like a sore thumb, in a way that can only be achieved by being a new kid in a school where everyone knows everyone. The first time he sees the new kid is in first period, but Garrett really takes notice of him at lunch.
He’s sitting alone. It makes Garrett’s heart clench in a way he can’t really describe. Garrett considers himself pretty lucky, since he gets to spend his first few days of high school following around the varsity soccer boys and clinging to every piece of advice they drop to him. He’s lucky, because the soccer guys know him, which means he has a place.
The new kid doesn’t have a place. Yet.
Garrett learns his name on the second day of school.
He takes one look around the people next to him in the lunch line, laughing loudly at some crude joke that he doesn’t find funny, then his gaze catches yet again on the new kid. Sitting all alone. On the second day of school. And, well, Garrett just won’t have it.
He determinedly grabs his tray of food, mutters a half-assed response to the guys who aren’t really his friends, and marches to the table.
“Hi,” he says loudly. The poor new kid startles. Garrett feels very, very awkward. “Uh—can I sit with you?”
The guy blinks.
But eventually he nods, and Garrett takes a seat.
“I’m Bram Greenfeld,” he says carefully, like it’s rehearsed. Garrett grins.
“Cool. I’m Garrett. Garrett Laughlin.”
Bram doesn’t reply to him.
Garrett sighs. “Okay man, I’m gonna be brutally honest. It’s the second day of school and you literally cannot continue on like this, so we’re friends now. I won’t lie to you, it might be awkward at first. But you seem a heck of a lot cooler than the seniors I’ve been trying to hang with so you’re stuck with me.”
“Oh.”
Bram has an odd, delighted smile.
After a beat, he says, “I think I’m okay with that.”
Garrett nods contently, and starts to eat his food.
It’s quiet, for another while, but it’s not as awkward as he expected it to be when he first sat down. Then, finally, Bram says aloud, “I play soccer, too.”
Garrett decides to like this kid.
ii.
The second time it happens, he and Bram have only been friends for a few months.
“I think we should switch lunch tables,” Garrett says conversationally. Bram pauses from eating his apple, and just raises an eyebrow at Garrett. He has a flawless delivery of expressions that never cease to make Garrett giggle. “You know Nick Eisner? He said we could sit with him and his friends. I think he hangs out with Spier and Leah Burke. Might be fun!”
Garrett almost doesn’t notice the way Bram’s skin flushes. Almost, because he’s distracted by scanning the rest of the room to see if he can find Nick’s table—but he’s pretty observant, so he still catches it. He purses his lips, intrigued.
Bram shrugs. “Sure,” he agrees. He swallows thickly. “Fun.”
So the next day, they trail after Nick until he leads them to his table. There’s an awkward moment where they all realize they’ve just brought seven people to a table that only fits six—but Simon Spier laughs it off good-naturedly and puts his food down so he can grab another chair. “The more, the merrier, right?” he says, and Garrett grins.
It’s kind of weird, at first. The group has a lot of inside jokes, but soon realizes that Bram and Garrett are on the outside of it all and try to include them more in the conversation. Garrett meets Morgan and Anna, who seem nice enough though they mostly keep to themselves or giggle with Leah. And Bram—
Bram opens up a little. Not in the way Garrett expected. He’s still practically silent at lunch, in a way he never is when they’re on the field or at Garrett’s house playing video games. But he spends a lot of lunch smiling, and laughing, and when he and Garrett do hang out he suddenly has more stories to tell.
They don’t sit with Nick and his friends every day, since Garrett is determined to mix it up and see how many genuinely cool people he can meet. But the days they do sit at that table are some of his favorites, which means by the time soccer season comes around and Nick, Bram, and Garrett all make the team, it’s an easy segway.
“You cool if we stay sitting with them?” Garrett asks, using his tray to gesture towards the table where their friends sit. Bram’s responding grin is bright and vibrant.
Garrett doesn’t even care that he sits at a table where he has to put up with Nick’s constant swooning over Amy Everett. Bram smiles the most at this table, and that weird little new kid has kind of become his best friend.
Garrett will take this weird new lunch arrangement.
iii.
The third time it happens, Garrett realizes he has a crush.
“Fuck,” he whispers, mostly under his breath. Bram still catches it. He looks up from his food and gives Garrett a curious look. Garrett just shakes his head.
Across the table, Leah rolls her eyes at something Nick says then laughs when he blows his straw wrapper at her.
It’s the middle of sophomore year, they’ve been sitting at this table for like a year now, and Garrett has only just now realized how hard he’s been crushing on Leah Burke.
“ Fuck ,” he mutters again.
Bram texts him that night.
from: bram greenfeld
[6:30] Hey, what happened at lunch?
to: bram greenfeld
[6:31] you ever look at someone n it’s like you’ve always seen them but suddenly you realize Just How Much you see them and you’re like “oh fuck”
from: bram greenfeld
[6:35] ….What?
to: bram greenfeld
[6:36] nvm
[6:37] do you care if we sit outside tomorrow
from: bram greenfeld
[6:57] Sure, buddy
So that’s that.
Bram doesn’t even give him an odd look when Garrett practically sprints outside with his tray of food the next day at lunch. Garrett finds that an impressive feat, because Bram gives him a lot of odd looks since Garrett does a lot of weird shit. Still, he’s grateful for it.
“So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Bram asks.
Garrett takes back his previous statement, he isn’t grateful at all.
“Ugh,” he whines. “It’s stupid.”
Bram gives Garrett his signature bitch face. It’s Garrett’s favorite expression; because it’s so damn condescending that he can’t help but laugh every time he sees it. He doesn’t really laugh now, though, because this look means that Bram is seeing through all of Garrett’s flimsy excuses.
“Do you have a crush on anyone?” he asks suddenly.
Bram’s face drops, startled. “What?”
Garrett stares pointedly down at his food. “God, I sound so middle school,” he complains. “Ugh. We’ve never talked about this—well, I have, in detail, but. You never say anything. Do you have a crush on someone?”
“Uh,” Bram says smartly. When Garrett looks up at him, his skin is darkened with blush. Garrett wonders what on earth this kid has to be embarrassed about. “I mean—there’s—I think people are attractive . I don’t—”
Garrett blinks at him. “Jesus Christ, you’re a mess. Okay. It’s whatever. I just… Maybe I, sort of, a bit realized there’s someone I have a crush on, which sounds so middle school , but. That’s what it is. A crush. Ugh.”
There’s quiet for a minute. Then, Bram’s mouth starts to lift slightly. “Oooooooooh,” he teases.
“Shut up .”
“No, honestly. Tell me who it is,” Bram begs.
Garrett can’t even pretend to be mad at him. “It’s Leah Burke.”
Bram’s eyes widen comically for a moment, but then his brow furrows, and he sets his mouth as he starts to think it through, before finally settling on a grin. “I can see it. That’s cute, man! You should go for it.”
Which is not the direction Garrett wanted to take this thing, but—whatever. He splutters, embarrassed, but smiles down at his lunch like a madman before quietly saying, “Thanks, dude.”
Bram just nods.
“And hey,” Garrett adds. “I want you to know you can trust me with this kind of stuff, too. I know I’m kind of an asshole, but you’re my best friend and I want to be there for this shit. Or whatever. You know.”
Bram laughs, quietly, and rolls his eyes.
iv.
The next time it happens, Garrett takes great care to make sure he doesn’t fuck it up.
This time, the words they exchange are so quiet, Garrett thinks he might have misheard them.
Bram is clenching the corners of his tray tightly, staring at the center of the table, and blinking like he’s trying not to cry. They sat alone today—something is going on at their normal table and it’s all centered around the fact that Simon was outed on the Tumblr over Christmas Break, and neither of them felt up to dealing with whatever is going on between Simon, Leah, Nick, and Abby.
So they sat alone. A few tables over, Simon sat by himself for a moment too, before quietly standing up and throwing his entire lunch away without eating it.
That’s when Bram had sucked in a sharp breath, and gritted out, “Garrett, I need to tell you something.”
“Uhh, okay, buddy,” Garrett says soothingly. He’s kind of freaked out by how upset Bram looks. Garrett had been so distracted by watching Simon Spier be sad that he hadn’t been paying that much attention to Bram.
It feels like not even that long ago, Garrett had been watching Bram sit alone. His heart kind of breaks the same way it did back then, except now it’s complicated and messy because apparently Simon did something shitty and all his friends decided it was worse than the shitty thing that was done to him.
Garrett was going to suggest they follow after him. But then—Bram’s like this. And no offense to Simon Spier, but Garrett kind of cares more about Bram’s well-being right now. Bram’s his best friend in the world, after all.
Bram is crying now, not super noticeably. Just enough that a few tears slip down his cheeks when he blinks. He takes a deep breath. He says it so quietly Garrett wonders if he heard Bram correctly.
“I’m gay,” he thinks he hears Bram say.
Something clicks in Garrett’s head.
He puts his hand over Bram’s, and squeezes until Bram looks up at him. And Garrett gives his most supportive smile. “I’m honored you told me,” he says honestly. Bram lets out a shaky breath, and even tries to smile. “You’re still my best friend, in case you were worried.”
Bram swallows. Then he smiles, for real this time. “Good,” he says, “because there’s something I need your help with.
v.
The next time it happens, Garrett can barely even contain his happiness.
He’s sitting at his usual spot at the lunch table—things now resolved between Spier and his friends—when Bram and Simon walk up behind him. He realizes they’re there when he notices Nick and Leah pointedly looking at them. Garrett turns slowly.
Simon’s face is pink with blush. “Hey Garrett,” he says awkwardly. “Uh—could I maybe sit there?”
Garrett looks back and forth between Simon and Bram, both blushing but sharing shy smiles, and he can’t help but grin. “Sure dude, this seat is yours.”
He slides over to the next chair. Bram gives him a grateful look, like it wasn’t the easiest thing in the world to decide that he wanted Simon and Bram to sit together more than he needed to sit by Bram himself. Simon puts his tray down, and Bram follows, and they share a soft and content smile before they start to eat. They don’t even seem to notice that the entire table is staring at them.
Simon catches on first. He looks up, looks around, and blushes again. Everyone is grinning at him and Bram. “Jesus,” he complains. “ What ?”
“So are you going to tell us what’s going on here or are you going to continually make us all suffer and endure your cuteness in silence?” Leah asks. When Garrett looks at Bram, it’s obvious the poor kid can’t even keep the grin off his face.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Simon lies. He returns to eating his pizza.
Bram rolls his eyes fondly, ignores the looks from everyone at the table, and pulls a package of Oreos that he slides onto Simon’s tray. It’s kind of nauseating to see the delighted grin that spreads across Spier’s face, because honestly how sweet and in love can two people be.
Garrett doesn’t even care. He’s never seen Bram this happy, and he’d do anything to keep it.
“You guys are adorable,” Abby sighs.
Garrett is inclined to agree.
+i.
The next time it happens, the roles are reversed.
Garrett’s been keeping a secret for a while. Mostly because it took him a long time to understand, and it was confusing, and whatever he was feeling felt too monumental to say out loud on the off chance he somehow fucked it up and got it wrong.
There lunch table has undergone a lot of changes; it’s nearly the end of senior year. Bram and Simon still sit together, every day. Morgan and Anna join them at random, and Nick and Abby don’t sit by each other anymore. There was a brief time where Nick left the table altogether, in the weeks immediately following their break up. But he made his way back eventually, and even admitted it wasn’t as weird as he thought it was gonna be.
The biggest change is that now Abby and Leah always sit together, inseparable. And more surprising than that , is that sometimes they’re joined by Taylor Metternich and Cal Price. Which was kind of cool, in a way. Garrett got weird vibes from them at first; he knows it’s because he has a reputation of being kind of a douche. But eventually, it wasn’t as weird. Taylor’s pretty cool when she’s not humble bragging, and Cal—
Well. He’s kind of the reason for Garrett’s secret.
Sometimes he’ll catch Cal looking at him, like he’s still trying to figure out just what Garrett’s deal is. And for some reason, every time he catches Cal, his heart skips a beat and his ears turn red. Garrett used to assume that he’d get weirded out because he and Cal weren’t really friends, and he was worried about what conclusions Cal was coming to. Until one lunch, when Garrett got distracted by the way Bram was looking at Simon—still, after all this time, like he was falling in love over and over again—and then he’d glanced at Cal, and it all just kind of hit him.
So, maybe he had a crush on Cal Price. That part he wasn’t entirely sure about.
But the conclusion Garrett had reached, after all of this confusion and turmoil and weird-feeling, was that he wasn’t straight. Which freaked him out for a second, before he realized it kind of made sense. Before he realized he had no reason to freak out.
He knew he had to tell Bram.
The table is practically empty today; some kind of theatre thing has Abby, Simon, Taylor, and Cal kept away from lunch. Nick is home sick, or something, which leaves just Bram and Garrett. Garrett decides, no better time than the present .
“Wanna leave campus?”
Bram just laughs in response.
Garrett drives, but Bram plugs in his iPod and starts playing the weird music he’s gotten into ever since he started dating Spier. Bram’s changed a lot since coming out, and in a good way. He smiles a lot more now. Everyone else gets to see the Bram that Garrett has gotten to know over the years, as he opens up a bit more. His music changed, and he cares more about musical theatre now. He wears this bracelet on his wrist, something he and Spier bought on one of their dates—a rainbow braid, or something, their own version of a promise. Garrett’s just glad Bram is happy. This is the kid who has always been his best friend, and now he isn’t so scared to be who he is, which means the whole world gets to know that shy little weirdo Garrett sat down next to on the second day of ninth grade.
He starts giggling, out of the blue.
Bram looks at him and raises an eyebrow.
“Sorry,” Garrett laughs. He really can’t stop. “It’s just—you know how people always wondered why we were best friends, because we seemed so different?”
“Yeah?”
Garrett keeps laughing. “And you know how people joke that, that one group of kids who are all friends but all have different interests but are inseparable and no one can really tell why, but then a few years later the group finds out it’s because they were all gay?”
He hears Bram suck in a sharp breath.
This isn’t exactly how he planned this.
The laughter kind of gets caught in his throat. The words he’s wanted to say out loud for so long now, they stick to the roof of his mouth. His entire chest feels tight. Did Bram feel this way, when he came out? Is it supposed to be like this? Garrett supposes it’s because he’s never said it out loud before, not even when he realized it himself. Maybe he should have practiced this.
He grips the steering wheel so tight, his knuckles are white. “Bram?”
“Yeah, buddy.”
Garrett blinks. He doesn’t stop staring forward. “I think I’m pansexual.”
He kind of timed this poorly. They’re at a stop sign. Garrett realizes he’s shaking, which is embarrassing. He knows he shouldn’t be so freaked out by this. It’s
Bram
, what the hell does he think Bram is going to say that’s so terrifying?
“Garrett,” Bram says softly.
“Yo.”
“Pull over so I can hug you.”
Garrett lets out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. He kind of laughs, but does as instructed, and as soon as he puts the car into park, Bram leans across the seat to hug him as best as he can. Garrett clings to him.
“It’s okay,” Bram says. “Why are you shaking?”
“I don’t know,” Garrett cries. Bram just laughs and holds him tighter. “Why is this so fucking scary? It’s like like, I think you’re gonna hate me or anything! Jesus .”
Bram is grinning when he pulls back. “I know,” he says. He pats Garrett’s knee. “I’m really honored you trust me with this. And I have so many questions.” Garrett groans, which just makes Bram laugh and squeeze his knee again. “I’ll save the teasing for later. But—are you gonna come out to everyone?”
Garrett shrugs. “I’m not really sure.”
“That’s okay, too.”
He puts the car back into drive. He only makes it a few blocks before he starts giggling again. “What is it with us and breakthroughs during lunch?” he asks Bram.
“You think with your stomach,” Bram answers easily. “It makes sense.”
“ Fuck you.”
Bram grins at the window.
They’re quiet for a while, listening to Bram’s music play through the shitty speakers of Garrett’s old car. It’s nice, the moments they have like this. Silence with Bram has never been awkward. Even know, after this huge weight feels like it’s lifted off of Garrett’s chest, he doesn’t feel the need to fill the silence with pointless thoughts. He knows that Bram is giving him a second to process. Garrett tried to do the same thing when Bram came out to him, however long ago.
Finally, he says, “Hey, Bram?”
“Yeah, buddy?”
Garrett takes a deep breath. “I’m really happy for you and Spier. In case I don’t say it enough.”
He can feel the warmth from Bram’s smile without even having to see it. Bram’s voice is soft when he says, “Thanks. Me, too.”
And Garrett smiles back.