Chapter Text
Night fell fast on Ach-To. The glowing sun set beneath the sparkling ocean waters not long after they’d reached the Temple Island again.
The boat was brought ashore. Hot wind whistled through the trees. And the Caretakers were still laughing.
They hopped out of the boat onto the cool earth still giggling, stumbling away towards the stone stairs leading up to the village. Their buckets were strapped tight to their backs, overflowing with oysters.
Ben and Rey stared in their wake, taking turns to both laugh and be absolutely bewildered.
"You don't think the caretakers will tell Luke about... what they saw, do you?" Ben asked her when they made their way up the rocky steps after gathering their belongings. They climbed slowly, hand in hand.
"I don't see why they would. Why?" Rey smiled. "Are you afraid he'll ground you for disobeying him?"
"I don't want him bothering you about it," he said. "If he says anything to you or tries anything, I swear —"
"Ben, I don't want you beating your uncle to a pulp because he disapproves."
"I won't. I mean, I could. I could, but I won't."
"Don't forget he is my master, after all."
He froze a step below her, his grip tightening. "I thought I was your master now."
Rey turned and nearly laughed at the silly jealous frown on his face. She couldn't read his mind anymore, but his face spoke loud and clear, expressing his bitterness at still being second to Luke. But remembering himself, he just huffed and looked away, as if he would not dare spoil this moment here with her. As if he didn't want to reveal just how much he desired the title, not Luke.
"Ben, having a side of our own doesn't have to be the end of my friendship with your uncle,” she said. "Or yours either, to be frank."
“Rey, you don’t understand; I don’t want anything to do with that man ever again. He’s lucky I haven’t strangled him for what he did.”
“What has he done?” she asked.
He was quiet for a long time, looking away again. “Rey, I want this to be just you and me. That’s all.”
“Maybe I could speak to him on your behalf —”
"No, no, that's — It's a lovely thought, sweetheart, but... (he was transfixed by the glowing smile he’d brought to her lips) some things just can’t be fixed. This happens to be one of them."
"But it doesn't have to be that way, Ben. All that’s standing in the way is your pride – his more than yours. I could learn much more from both of you."
"I could show you the ways of the Force better than anyone. We don’t need some crazy old hermit coming between us. You're always saying how awful his lessons are."
"His lessons are terrible, yes — "
"Then?"
"He's your family, Ben," she said, revealing more through her tone than her words. If he only knew how fortunate he was to even have someone to call family.
He was quiet a moment, looking into her eyes, understanding at last. "So would you be. If you were with me."
Her heart swelled with joy. He relaxed at once from the feel of her hand against his cheek. They both did.
"Well?" He felt his way around her waist and pulled her to him slowly, until her chest touched his and she felt the warmth of his lips brush against hers. "Will you let me be your Master?"
Her face grew hot at his closeness. She trembled when she took a breath. "We'll see after our first lesson. I need to know you deserve such an honor."
He laughed. The touching sound of his laughter made it hard for her to keep a straight face.
“Fair enough,” he said. “You're worth it.”
She beamed, slipping her arms around his neck. "And if I say yes, will you teach me to swim?"
"Of course. If you teach me to cook."
"Only if you teach me to speak the Caretaker’s language.”
"As long as you teach me how you put up with Luke and not cut him in half every time you’re near him."
"Deal.” Her sweet laughter filled the night air.
She felt light enough to float and touch the stars sparkling in the dark sky between the clouds. She couldn’t stop smiling. Only a week ago she'd been staring into the white desert sky of Jakku, carving marks on the rusty wall of her home, wondering when the family she longed for would arrive. Days ago, the weight of her loneliness had hung heavier than ever before, and the man standing before her had been her enemy. This man whose gentle eyes looked into hers with more love than she had ever known. His arms, holding her to him, were the home she had been searching for her whole life. She no longer felt lost - as if this were where she was meant to be. With him, only him.
“Rey,” Ben whispered, kissing her gently.
A flush of heat rose to her cheeks from deep within her. Her fingers knotted in the long strands of his dark hair. He woke something inside her, something which ardently begged to be sated by him. To feel his hands across her body, touching her like before.
"Rey!"
They froze.
Luke’s raspy voice floated down from the cluster of stony huts still a ways above. But the sound of it was enough to send a chill down Rey’s back. She couldn’t imagine the chaos that would ensue if he staggered down here and discovered them in the dark in each other’s arms. His screams would be heard all over the galaxy.
“I suppose this is where I say goodnight,” he grimaced.
“Goodnight? Won’t you have supper with us? What about your fish?”
"I don't think Luke would like me being there. And I don't want to cause an argument between you. Besides, he stinks."
"Well, I don't care whether he likes it or not," she said matter-of-factly. "You helped catch the food, you have a place at the table. I won't let him hurt you, I promise."
Ben smiled warmly at the determination in her eyes, seeing in them just how much she meant her words.
"Will you come?" she asked softly.
"Rey!" Luke's voice rang again from somewhere up ahead.
Ben cringed at the sound of it, but then took a huge breath, huffing it out. "Alright," he agreed, his deep voice steady. "For you."
She gave him a peck on the lips and turned to keep going, but his hands were suddenly around her, pulling her back, spinning her around until his mouth was on hers again. Kissing her slowly, deeply. Until she was melting in his arms.
"Rey!"
Breaking away from him in quiet laughter, Rey raced up the rest of the way towards the village.
The noisy porgs around the island had mostly quieted for the night, and a peaceful calm surrounded the village that felt nearly identical to the glow of happiness on her face. There were a few Lanai out and about while others busied themselves with their own suppers inside their stone huts. Each one glowed a fiery gold from the inside.
One or two Lanai stared as they saw her come up the stone steps, whispering to each other and hurrying along. Rey could’ve sworn she heard laughter. Luke stood in the middle of it all, hands on his hips, facing the village as if waiting for Rey to shout back and come stumbling out of her hut further down the lane. At the sound of her steps, he spun around.
"There you are!" he chuckled lightly, as if relieved to see her alone. "You were beginning to worry me. For a second I thought you might've been with — "
His voice trailed off as Ben's hulking figure came trudging up the stone steps behind Rey. In an instant, the look of relief vanished, and Luke's happy smile with it. Cold anger furrowed his graying brows, matching Ben's expression when he laid eyes on his uncle.
Ben cleared his throat, nodding politely. "Luke."
"Ben," Luke replied with a fake awful smile. His frightening anger was all for her. "Rey — "
"Luke, I ran into Ben after our lesson today, isn't that the funniest thing?" she said quickly.
"Hilarious," he grumbled.
"Turns out he's quite good at fishing. I've invited him to have supper with us, I hope you don't mind."
"You — you what! "
"Wonderful!" she smiled. "Come on, Ben. I'll show you how to scale the fish before we cook them. Luke, I hope you made enough of your stew for the three of us."
The pair strolled past Luke straight into the warmth of his hut. Into the smell of woodsmoke and skunky stew boiling in a pot over the fire. They left the old man outside with his jaw in the dirt and a vein pulsing madly in his forehead.
For one with such big rough hands accustomed to carrying a bulky saber, Ben handled a knife with precision and care. He took to cooking more eagerly than fishing, and, unfortunately for he and Rey, it wasn't hard to see why.
He got to be close to her, listening attentively as she explained and demonstrated the proper way of doing things. Laughing under their breaths each time he got something wrong. Bumping and touching each other playfully. By accident at first, then very much on purpose. All while Luke brooded over in the corner, stirring his stew silently, ready to step in if anything happened that shouldn't.
Rey felt the weight of his eyes on their backs as they worked. The grunts he made whenever Ben made her laugh magnified the uncomfortable awkwardness of having him there. His blatant refusal to even look at Ben was especially helpful. He really planned on making it through the whole meal without a word. It irritated Rey, and his stubbornness only made her wish to see them reconcile even more.
The unpleasant feeling in the hut lingered long into their quiet supper.
They sipped and ate their meals around the fire with only the crackle of the wood to fill the silence. Rey couldn't help her eyes from wandering off her plate to look at Ben who stared off into space, lost in some deep thought as he ate. Now that they had silenced their minds from one another, it was impossible to know what he might be thinking. She figured he was dreading every second of this. Maybe wishing he hadn't agreed to come at all. Blaming her for the awful time he was having.
But when he looked up, catching her eye, there was no regret there, no anger. Only tenderness, and a smile which said everything he could not say out loud. It made her want to be in his arms again.
So engrossed were they with one another, they were completely blind to everything else around them, including the disgruntled old man sitting there with them. Luke's eyes shot back and forth between Ben and Rey, clanking his spoon against his bowl, louder and louder.
He gave a throaty, irritable cough that finally tore their eyes away from one another. Ben's attention fell back to the plate in his lap, and Rey frowned at her master.
"So, Master Luke," she began, "how was the meeting?"
Luke's blue eyes snapped their chilly gaze on her. He was clearly annoyed at having to respond, because he wasn't ignoring her .
"Fine," he muttered and sipped his murky soup. "I was hardly there for most of it. Other things," - he shot a look at her - "have been preoccupying my thoughts. So much, I couldn't quite concentrate. Though, there was something strange... Towards the end of the meeting two Lanai came rushing in, giddy like you wouldn't believe, wanting to speak to the elders about something they saw during their trip to the smaller island."
Ben and Rey exchanged looks, their faces reddening.
"Oh? What was it? What did they see?" Rey picked at the fish on her plate, trying to appear nonchalant, and failing terribly.
"Well, that's just it," said Luke. "They wouldn't say. They whispered something to one of the elders and I was asked to leave."
A smile tugged the corner of Ben's mouth as he ate.
"Something they didn't want me knowing, I suppose. Some big secret they have to hide from the guy who's been living among them for almost a decade. Eh, it's probably something to do with the Festival of Return in a few days."
"The Festival of Return?" asked Rey.
"Well, you see —"
"It's a monthly festival the caretakers organize. To celebrate the return of the males to the island."
Across the fire where he sat, Ben's eyes never left his plate when he spoke. Only to look up when Luke and Rey stared at him in surprised silence.
"I — I read about it in the history books," he said.
Luke paid him no mind. He turned back to Rey. "Yes well, they only stay for one night, so the caretakers like everything to be perfect. And secretive, apparently."
"One? One night?" Rey raised a brow. "After a whole month of being away they only stay for a night? Why?"
Ben sipped his drink, chuckling. "One night is usually all it takes."
Luke shot him a glare while Rey simply shook her head. "I don't understand," she said.
Luke coughed uncomfortably. "Well — you see, Rey... The males really only come back for one purpose. That is to say, they and the females, they... Well, they —"
"They have sex."
"Ben!" Luke shouted.
"Well it was taking you ages."
"I was trying to find the right words! Something not so — vulgar!"
"There's nothing vulgar about it. When two beings care for each other they express it in different ways. That just happens to be one of them. That's why they call it making love , right?"
Ben's words were for Luke, but his eyes, whether consciously or not, kept wandering back to Rey, watching her through the flames between them. There was something curiously enticing about the way he said making love ; she felt butterflies flutter inside her again. She looked away instantly to hide her blush before Luke noticed.
She was no stranger to the subject. Even growing up an orphan on a sand-covered wasteland like Jakku, there was no escaping the curiosities of new life and what beings did to create it. Though, she didn't understand much. Nor had she any idea how to go about it. In fact, up until now it was as interesting to her as Luke's lecture.
But hearing Ben use those words, describing it as an act of something more, it brought a smile to her lips. She found herself more curious than ever before. Her mind filled with questions for him she wouldn't dare speak aloud in front of Luke. Somehow, she knew this feeling for Ben had something to do with those words. She knew the warmth shivering down her back, in her chest, was about him. Whenever she looked at him, touched him, kissed him —it was all tied to those words. If only they were alone so he might tell her more.
Luke, however, was not at all impressed.
"Love," he scoffed, turning to Rey as if she were the only one there. "Love has nothing to with it. Selfish indulgence, if you ask me. There's no wisdom to be gained from carnal pleasures. No important purpose. Nothing but selfish attachment and defilement."
"That's a little bitter," Ben teased. "Though, I suppose when you've never done it because you couldn't get it —"
"Oh, I could get it! I could've gotten it plenty of times!"
"Sure you could."
"However!" Luke thundered. "I was strong enough not to waste my time with such distractions. That's one thing the Jedi got right; I'll give them that. Ridding themselves of the temptation was probably the smartest thing they ever did."
"Not all the Jedi," Ben chimed in again. "If they had, you and my mother wouldn't exist."
"Yes," Luke said. "And look where that mistake led us to. To you."
He said it with such viciousness, he might as well have buried his saber into Ben's gut. Rey could feel Ben's struggle to keep his face blank, to appear untouched by his uncle's blow. But the hate was there, building up in his dark eyes.
"Luke!" Rey frowned.
"Mistake, was it?” Ben said. “Well that mistake led to the most powerful force-user alive —"
"Oh please —"
" — while the former ended up a coward, hiding on some forgotten planet."
The most nerve-wracking silence followed this sentiment, during which the fire toasting their wood grew dim, and both uncle and nephew glowered at one another with rage, ready to lunge and tear out each other’s throats at the slightest provocation. Ben's plate shook in his hands. One more vicious remark from being broken into a thousand pieces on Luke's head.
This was not the reunion she'd hoped for. She chewed her lip nervously, scrambling to think of something that would steer the conversation back to friendly territory.
“Er – Luke!” She said. “Will there be lots of music at the festival? And dancing?”
She tapped the old man’s shin lightly with her foot to get his attention. But if he felt it, he gave no sign.
“If you think I’ve been hiding from you or Snoke or anyone else in this whole damn galaxy you’re sadly mistaken!” he said. “If anyone’s been hiding, it’s you . Turning your back on your parents and our entire legacy to hide behind that damned mask and pretend to be something you’re not!”
“I’m not hiding, Luke,” Ben shot back. “I’m right here. But you can’t even look at me.”
“Well who can with that cut across your face? It’s grotesque.”
Ben ignored the jab. “Does it remind you too much of that night? Of what you did?”
Silence again – only this time, Rey felt no inclination to disrupt it. It was the sudden breath Luke took that sparked her curiosity. The way his mouth parted ever so slightly as if the question was a painful bruise Ben had managed to poke.
She remembered Ben mentioning something about this before. The night he’d saved her from drowning and Luke had forced him to stay.
Finish what you started that night. Try. Unless you can’t do it while I’m awake. Rey turned the words over in her head. What had Ben meant by that? Couldn’t do what?
She knew as much about it now as she did then. And judging by the way Luke scowled at Ben – as if ready to force choke him should he dare utter another word – Rey deduced he didn’t want her knowing more.
“That’s enough,” Luke warned him. He turned his attention back to the bowl of stew in his lap that had grown cold.
But Ben was much too delighted at having him in his grip to stop now. “Go on. Say it. Tell Rey what really happened that night.”
“She knows what happened that night. She knows what you did – all those innocents you slaughtered!”
“But does she know what you did? Does she know the truth?”
“Stop this, Ben, I’m warning you —”
“What? Are you afraid she’ll resent you when she knows what you really are?”
Luke was on his feet at the same time as Ben. Their bowls crashed to pieces on the stone floor. Rey’s heart leapt to her throat when she saw them move towards each other. She jumped from her seat to stand between them.
“Ben! Don’t,” she said.
Eyes pointed like daggers; fists clenched - both men looked at one another with revulsion. Darkness bled from the rage enveloping Ben bit by bit. Beneath her hand, his skin colored a scalding red. If she weren’t there between them, Rey was sure Ben wouldn’t hesitate to let himself go to the Dark if it meant hurting his uncle.
But having her there, hearing the frightened tremble in her voice when she whispered his name again, it snapped him out of it. Pulled him back from the dark thoughts blinding him with rage. He tore his eyes away from Luke to look at Rey, and the moment he did, the air in the hut felt lighter. Ben’s chest rose and fell beneath her hand, steadier with each passing second, quickly reading the message in her eyes: to hurt Luke would hurt her, something he could not bear to do.
Behind them, Luke’s wrath remained intact, especially when he saw the way they looked at one another. Surely he suspected something, something he did not like one bit.
“I think I’ve had enough supper for one night,” he said.
Without so much as a warning, he ushered them out of the hut back out into the night. All was quiet in the village. Every hut down the mountain lane was dark on the inside, and only the soft snoring of sleeping Lanai whistling out the windows gave any indication they weren’t abandoned. Torches were planted firmly in the ground outside each hut to light a path.
Luke blew out the one outside his hut with one quick puff, smoke curling up into the cloudy sky. These clouds would bring another storm tonight, Rey realized with a grimace.
“Rey,” said Luke, nodding down the lane, “we have a full day of training tomorrow, so I suggest you get some sleep. Goodnight. Ben, off you go.” He nodded in the opposite direction. The dark, lonely path which led to Ben’s miserable secluded little hut. But neither Ben nor Rey moved a muscle. She didn’t want to say goodnight to him like this, so coldly. But Luke would not have it any other way, by the looks of it. He watched Rey closely, waiting.
“ Hmph .” Ben cleared his throat. “Luke, maybe I should walk Rey to her hut. Make sure she gets there alright.”
Her heart skipped a beat.
“This isn’t some alley in Mos Eisley, Ben. I’m sure Rey can make it there on her own.” Luke eyed her for assurance, but he found nothing but a glowing smile as she stared at Ben.
“I’m only thinking of her safety, Luke.”
“Since when do you care about her safety?”
“It’s alright, Master Luke, really,” Rey said. “I wouldn’t mind the company.”
Ben’s smile sent her heart racing. How she wished the old man were asleep inside or looking the other way so that she might close the space between she and this man who looked at her with the same longing she was feeling. She wanted - she needed - to feel him holding her once more before the night was truly over. If only it weren’t for Luke…
“Well, if that’s the case, I’ll accompany you myself, Rey. I could use the walk to move my bowels.” He rubbed his gurgling belly, ignoring the expression of disgust on Ben’s face. “So that settles it then. Goodnight , Ben.”
Ben, either from the day’s exhaustion or an unwillingness to cause more conflict in front of Rey, didn’t argue. Though there was no mistaking his disappointment. His features softened when he looked back at Rey.
“Goodnight,” he said to her.
“Goodnight,” she replied softly.
Her heart ached watching him turn and walk off in the other direction.
“Rey…”
Suddenly, the decision to quiet the connection in their heads seemed frustratingly absurd. If she couldn’t be with him in person, they could be together through their bond, at least.
“Rey!”
Her focus snapped back to Luke. “Yes?”
His brows, lower than she’d ever seen them, nearly covered his eyes, but they couldn't hide the frightening glare he was giving her.
“Walk with me,” he said.
It was an uncomfortably quiet walk to her hut. Rey tried breaking the silence more than once; calling him by name to offer apologies, commenting on the weather, even complimenting him on his gut-wrenching stew. Every attempt was brushed off with a grunt or a passive wave of his hand, commanding silence.
The patter of their boots on the path. Chirping insects in the grass and weeds. Frothing waves beating against the rocks. They were all permitted to utter sound, but her.
She had never known Luke this furious. Not even on the occasion she accidentally blew a hole through the roof of a Caretaker's hut. She'd been cleaning her blaster a day or two after first arriving, trying to distract herself after first hearing Ben's voice in her head. It had gone off in her hands, blasting a hole through her roof and an unsuspecting Lanai's home. She'd nearly buried the poor Caretaker in heavy bricks from the collapsing roof. No one was hurt, thankfully. But for this very reason, the Lanai kept a wary eye on her from afar, lest they should find themselves becoming victims of the trouble that tended to surround her.
Not until they were a few steps from her hut did Luke finally make himself heard. He turned on her so suddenly she nearly crashed into him.
"Inviting him to supper with us! Have you lost your mind, Rey? I gave you one rule and you keep deliberately breaking it! Can’t you see how dangerous this is for you ? Just what were you thinking ?”
She loathed the condescending tone of his gritty voice. As if this were another lesson she was failing to get right.
“I was thinking, Master Luke, this childish conflict between you had to come to an end. And since you’re both stubborn as wookies I took it upon myself to bring you together. To end it once and for all.”
“To-end-it-once-and-for-all – Rey! This is not some petty domestic spat! This is so much worse. It's unforgivable." The rims of his eyes glistened red when he took a breath. He looked away, hiding his face.
"What's going on, Master Luke?" It unnerved her to see him this upset, this guilt-ridden. Completely convinced nothing could be done.
He shook his head when he looked away, silent for a moment. "I appreciate you trying to help, but you're wasting time that could be put to better use. There's no sense in this."
"Luke, don't you see how great this could be? Not just for you and Leia but for the Resistance! For the end of the war, for —"
"For you?"
She was quiet, tightening her jaw.
"Don't think I didn't notice you making goo-goo eyes at him all through supper. You know, I'm not so convinced you happened to find each other by chance earlier. Not with how perfectly comfortable you two seem around one another. I thought I made it clear he wasn't to go anywhere near you, and then you go invite him to supper! Whispering and giggling with him the whole time like..." He huffed. If he didn't say it, it couldn't be. "I thought you were far more dedicated to your training than this," he said.
"I'm more dedicated now than I've ever been! If you could forgive one another for whatever tore you apart in the first place, Ben would come back to the light. The three of us could triumph over Snoke and bring down The First Order. This could be how we win!"
"That chance came and went a long time ago," he said. "He'll never forgive me for what happened, and neither will Leia once she knows. It's hopeless. And I've told you a million times I'm not winning anything ! I'm training you so that when you come face-to-face with the Dark you won't be overpowered or tempted. But it won't work if you keep flirting with the enemy, so I'll say it one last time : stay away from him!"
“I want to know him, Luke,” she said.
He stared at her, incredulous. “Excuse me?”
“He could be different, Luke. He is different with me. There’s still light in him. I feel it whenever he’s around and so does he. We understand each other, in a way. We… We care for one another.”
She said this with as much delicacy as possible, fearing the horrified expression coming over his face the more she went on.
“ Do you?” he said. “I wonder what the Resistance might have to say about that.”
There was an ugly sensation in the pit of her stomach. She swallowed. “Leia would be happy to have her son back. She wants him to come home.”
“Then that’s exactly where I’m sending him.”
“You… You’re sending him away?”
“Its what I should’ve done from the start. I don’t want to cause a commotion for the Lanai – not with their most important festival only days away. But as soon as it’s over, I’m contacting The Resistance and getting him away from you once and for all.”
There was an awful ache in her chest at hearing this. “What about keeping him here until he remembered who he was?”
“Obviously he’s not interested. Maybe his mother can convince him otherwise, but I’m washing my hands clean of him. He’s been nothing but a nuisance to me and a distraction to you, and I’m not about to stand by and watch him poison you against me.”
“Poison?! Just listen to the way you talk about him. As if he were some —”
He waved her words away, exasperated. “Look, that doesn’t matter! I’m only thinking of your safety, Rey. So if you'd like me to continue being your master, I don’t ever want to see you alone with him again. Rey, I forbid it.”
She opened her mouth to protest, but Luke held up a hand, silencing her. “And, if you agree… Perhaps I could reconsider my decision about helping The Resistance.”
“You’re serious? You would come back?”
“I… I would take the idea seriously, sure.”
His weak nod didn’t inspire much confidence, but the fact that he was even considering it was enough to excite Rey. She could imagine it so clearly. She and the legendary Luke Skywalker defeating Snoke and The First Order in one swoop. It would mean the end to years of war and turmoil. The end of being no one. The end of…
Truth cut through her so suddenly, morphing her excitement into dread.
All this for the end of she and Ben. The end of his calming presence. Of having him at her side to listen and comfort her in a way no one else could. The end of listening to his deep voice whisper sweet things in her ear when he held her. The end of this indescribable happiness. The end of their plans to have a side of their own.
Her quiet didn’t escape Luke’s notice.
“Come on now, Rey,” he said. “This shouldn’t be so difficult. You’ve been begging me to do it so much since you arrived I’ve started hearing it in my dreams.”
“I know. I know I have. It’s just…”
“Just…?”
“What about Ben?” she mumbled, feeling tears burn behind her eyes.
“Really, Rey. After all he's done, after all you've seen, you really think he would abandon his obsession to surpass my father for you ? Rey, do you?"
A most horrible feeling made her insides turn cold. She had never felt so ashamed of her origin back home. There was never reason enough, she supposed. Everyone was as low as she was, some even lower. But it was different on the outside. To hear it pitied and ridiculed in the mouths of people who knew a big deal, who were a big deal, it made her feel small and plain.
You’re not special enough for him to want you.
It’s what he might as well have said. And it worried her it was true. The girl with no name. A dirt-poor scavenger unwanted even by her own parents. No one. Ben had never said he thought any less of her because of it, yet that didn't stop it from being true. It tore at her heart to think Luke could be right. That Ben just hadn't realized it yet.
“Look, that came out wrong, but you know what I mean,” Luke said. “You're opening yourself up to the Dark, and for what? A pair of pretty eyes? Why risk so much of yourself over him? For something that can never be. Even if by some miracle Ben did choose to renounce the Dark and come home, he would be shunned, exiled if not executed for everything he’s done in the name of The First Order. Even someone like Leia isn’t above the law. The First Order wins? He’ll be lost. As will you if you join him.”
She swallowed the wretched lump in her throat. It scared her, the thought of Ben in some cell on a prison ship awaiting execution while his mother struggled to stay alive in a medcenter bed. Or even… Ben on a throne of Snoke’s creation, she standing there by his side.
No, she trembled. That future was not worth even thinking about, because it would never happen. She would never allow anything to tempt her to the Dark. Nothing. Not even … Not even Ben, she swallowed. It was the first time she had ever felt even the slightest bit of doubt. Meaningless, of course, because Ben would come back. And when he did The Resistance would see him as she did. They would understand him as she did and his mother would forgive him like her because she would feel and know the light inside him had triumphed, and Kylo Ren was not a part of him anymore. They would see. They had to.
A cold drizzle came down from the cloudy sky like a watery mist, shrouding the island and their heads in a soft, slow blanket of rain.
“It’s late,” Luke said, pulling up the hood of his cloak. “We’ll finish this tomorrow. At the crack of dawn, you hear?”
"Goodnight, Master Luke," Rey said, too quiet for him to hear or care as he shuffled off back the way they'd come. He left Rey standing alone in the cold dark behind him.
She lit a fire inside her hut and wrapped a blanket her around her shoulders, sitting quietly near the growing flames. They warmed the chill in her bones but didn't fill the silence as she had hoped. It was too unsettling. Despite everything that had been said, she couldn't help but wish Ben were here. She cursed herself for having suggested they lessen their bond. His voice, his reassurances, would mean everything to her now. In their absence, there was only fear and conflict and worry. They hung over her head like the dark clouds in the sky as she thought everything over.
If Luke agreed to fight, there would be no chance for The First Order. Leia, Finn, and everyone else still fighting, still daring to hope, would be safe at last. The galaxy would be rid of Snoke's malignant influence and oppressive rule. The Dark would be put to rest at last. So long as she agreed to stop seeing Ben. To surrender her happiness. She wrapped the blanket tight around herself and pressed her lips together, fighting tears and then wiping them away when they ran down her cheeks. She knew, of course, that there was no use thinking it over when the decision was obvious. The right thing. What else could she do?
She needed to speak to Ben.
The thought of slipping away to see him crossed her mind until she remembered she would have to pass by Luke's hut to get there. The old man was certainly crazed enough to keep watch on the street all night in case either of them dared to go see the other. The angry lecture she would no doubt be forced to endure if she got caught was not worth the attempt.
Over and over, she tossed their conversation around in her head for hours until thunder roared up above and she began counting to slow the pace of her heart. She got to twelve before the sound of the rain lulled her to sleep.
She dreamt of the white-hot sands of Jakku as rain poured outside.
She felt the air, dry and boiling, slowly cover every inch of her like a sweltering blanket. The sun blazing in the sky was so bright it blinded her no matter where she looked.
"No! Come back! "
Her flesh crawled at the familiar sound. She spun around in the sand and was struck with horror, watching a little girl sink to her knees in the sand. Sobbing loudly, desperately. So horrified at having been left behind. One of the three buns tying up the girl's hair had come undone and spilled a short curtain of brown hair down her back. Rey could feel the girl's despair with every beat of her pounding heart. She had seen this before. But where?
A blast in the sky made her jump. A ship and its exhausts blazing blue as it swept up into the white sky. Shining silver in the sun. She knew that ship.
She clenched her teeth tight. And in a searing rage her hand shot up, feeling the tremble in her fingers; all her focus on the ship which had come to a halt in the sky, struggling to continue up. It shook along with her hand as she held it there willing it to stop, willing it to come back, to crash into the sand in a burning roar. The girl continued crying behind her, wailing, bringing hot tears to Rey's own eyes. How could they do this to her… How dare they...
Anger blinded her, enveloped her, until the pain made her head ache and the image melted away like water. The heat, the ship, the girl, they were all gone. Only the blazing sun still blinded her. She hid her face away in her hands.
"They're never coming back..." A voice echoed, so strange, so familiar she spun her head in alarm at hearing it . "But... There's someone who still could..."
The voice melted into her dreams in waves, sweeping away the pain and the anger until it felt as if they had never existed. Covering every inch of her with that tender, pleasurable warmth that reminded her of him. As if he were there pressed up against her, his breaths hot on the back of her neck, his arms slowly wrapping around her, pulling her closer to him. Like coming home.
Rey …
Her kissed her ear and she smiled from the ticklish feeling. Her eyes were heavy, too heavy with sleep to face the blinding light of this dream, but she felt herself reach back for him anyway. Her fingers running though his long messy hair, pushing his head down to her neck again, wanting more.
He laughed quietly against her skin, kissing her neck. Good morning, sweetheart.
“Ben,” she cried softly. Her body trembling in his arms.
She woke with a start alone on the hard floor of her hut, the early morning sun peeking through the curtain over her door.