Work Text:
It was ridiculously hot in Diego’s one-bedroom flat. Johnny often mused on whether or not the Brit was one of those cold-blooded lizard people in disguise, but he was becoming increasingly more sure with each passing second spent inside his stuffy living room.
Honestly, he wasn’t sure how they all ended up like this- all spread out on Diego’s large wool rug with Twizzlers, a box of half-eaten pizza and various kinds of chips all scattered around them. However, he could recall a couple of red flags. Perhaps the biggest was when Diego called earlier.
“HP is here. Want to come over and play?” he proposed.
“For the last time, it’s called ‘hang out’ not ‘play’ you stupid dinosaur.” And still, Johnny came. With Gyro, of course, since this was all a ploy for Diego to show off his newly formed relationship with HP.
A quick glance in her direction revealed that HP was just as unamused as Johnny himself. Still, she went about setting up the game Taboo in the center of their make-shift circle.
“Alright, we’re all set. Do we need to go over the rules again?”
“Nope, Johnny told me all about it on the way over. I’m pretty much a pro now,” Gyro responded, 24-carat smile firmly in place.
“…then you two can go first,” came HP’s cool reply followed by a sharp gasp from her partner.
“But- that’s- you’re giving them the advantage!”
HP simply handed Diego the buzzer and the blonde’s outrage miraculously disappeared.
“See this, Joestar? One wrong word and I will buzz. That goes for you too, Zeppeli.”
“Nyo-hoho. No one’s truly getting buzzed without any alcohol around,” Gyro laughed, and Johnny felt a tiny spark of pride at having taught the Italian that particular bit of slang.
“Shut-up. This is a serious game. No alcohol allowed,” Diego retorted while Johnny’s eyes caught on the game’s box which clearly said ‘for fun’ but damn, what did he know?
Gyro straightened, cracking his knuckles with this look that screamed game on.
“You’re going down, Diego. HP flip the timer.”
Gyro eagerly selected the first card as soon as the timer started and only hesitated a moment before getting into position. He clasped his hands together before resting them softly against his cheek. His eyes were closed, and a cute little smile graced his lips.
“…sleep?”
“Correct,” HP confirmed as Gyro nodded eagerly. Both her and Diego were hovering over Gyro for signs of cheating but while the former was calm as always, Diego fumed.
“What the fuck- this isn’t bloody charades!” Gyro halted in his reach for the next card at this new piece of information.
“What? But Johnny said you have to act the word out…” and yes, Johnny had said that. But in his defense, he wanted to see how cute Gyro would look acting out the words. Sue him.
“No, you’re only supposed to use words or phrases without using the words on the cards because they’re taboo,” HP explained as Gyro shot an accusatory look in Johnny’s direction.
“Whatever. Gyro we’re running out of time.” Johnny deflected and it worked like a charm. Gyro quickly snatched the next card, ever the competitor.
“Alright,” he started, still using hand gestures much to Johnny’s amusement, “so this is a-”
“Joke,” Johnny cut in with just a tiny bit of satisfaction.
“No, no this is something else I like-”
“Me.”
“No- well, I mean yes but- remember when I-”
“Fell off your horse?” At this point, Johnny was just fucking around much to Gyro’s exasperation.
“Johnny, whose side are you on?” he pouted when HP called time, signaling the end of their turn.
As Diego literally jumped around in glee Gyro made his way over to Johnny who couldn’t hide the shit-eating grin on his face even if he tried. Gyro ended up tackling him into what quickly became a bear hug as Johnny giggled the whole time.
“Alright, so that’s one point for Johnny and Gyro,” HP announced and the aforementioned two finally broke apart long enough for Johnny to pull out his small notebook and keep track of the score.
“Now, it’s our turn,” Diego spoke up, dawning his smug grin, “let’s wreck ‘em, babe.”
Johnny likes to take note of things and one of those things was the way HP’s cheeks lit up to match with her bright hair. It was unusual for the rather stoic woman. A feat indeed.
They all set up for the next match- or, Gyro and HP did while Johnny chewed on a Twizzler and Diego sat on his hands rocking in anticipation. Gyro handed the little hourglass to Johnny before moving to stand behind HP with the buzzer.
“Ready? Go.”
HP quickly scanned her chosen card as the timer began and looked up to lock eyes with Diego.
“Silver,” was her one-word clue.
“Bullet,” was the instant reply.
“Rocks.”
“Food.”
“You.”
“Dinosaur!” Diego nearly screeched. The game went on like this with Gyro calling “correct” intermittently, albeit, confusedly. Meanwhile, Johnny wondered if this was solid proof that Diego was reptilian or not.
When he called time the two had racked up a truly bizarre amount of points. Johnny almost wanted to applaud them. “You two cheatin?” he accused instead.
Diego scoffed. “Of course not. We just like to roleplay and-”
Diego cut himself off, apparently realizing the error in his ways as his face turned a violent shade of red. He coughed.
“Yes, well, anyways that was a solid game. Tell me, what does that put us at?”
“…Fifteen to one,” Johnny muttered and yeah, he was starting to get that competitive itch Gyro was feeling earlier.
“Johnny, now will you take this seriously?” Gyro asked and in place of an answer Johnny pulled himself over to the card deck, his first big move since the game began. Gyro smirked.
“Need I remind you; I’ve got the buzzer so-”
“Yeah, whatever stupid,” Gyro interrupted, all his attention on Johnny now. Or maybe it never left.
HP flipped the timer and suddenly everyone was hyper-focused on Johnny. That was fine with the ex-jockey though. He thrived under attention.
Upon seeing the first word Johnny knew he had this in the bag.
“Slow Dancer is my…”
“Horse!” Gyro answered and Johnny felt another tiny smile slip onto his face as he selected the next card.
“My favorite song.”
“Tusk” Gyro called, patting his lap to the beat of, in Johnny’s humble opinion, the best song ever.
The round continued in similar fashion with some rather embarrassing clues thrown in- “I can’t help it when I…” (cry), “what do I like to call you?” (honey), and “my kink?” (bug bites) but Johnny was beyond caring since he could taste their upcoming victory.
At one point ‘Julius Caesar’ came up and Johnny respectfully passed it. He would not air that one out so long as ‘Gyro’ didn’t want him to.
In the end, they matched the number of points as the last round, putting them in the lead by one point. Johnny enjoyed the blatant frustration Diego showed at this new development while Gyro stuffed another slice of pizza down his throat in celebration.
“Maybe we should take a break?” HP suggested, eyeing Diego carefully but he just as quickly shook his head.
“No, I’ve got a better idea,” he said, “next round is our last.”
This was met with a number of complaints from Johnny and Gyro. Johnny gave the loudest complaint of them all until he remembered something. Diego sucked at one crucial part of this game. Years of playing it together, because yes, they had unfortunately known each other for too long, revealed that his enemy turned sort-of friend was absolute shit at giving clues. Therefore, they still had a chance to win. A rather large chance. Johnny liked those odds.
He quickly reached out to Gyro, quieting him before declaring, “ok fine. Have it your way, Diego.” And while Diego was happily setting up for the next, and now final round, Johnny whispered to Gyro all about the blonde’s shortcomings. By the time the game was set, Johnny and Gyro were sharing the same cheesy expression. This time Johnny would handle the buzzer and when he got situated next to Diego, the game began.
The word was ‘cat.’ Pretty simple but leave it to Diego to make it anything but.
“Ahem, so I recently visited the local park and, let me say, the weather was brilliant that day, so unlike the day prior which was absolutely dreadful. Anyway, I noticed these three particular children were playing a bit of football and they had this little dog…”
HP had tuned out, Johnny could tell. He would have done the same if he weren’t actively listening for the buzz words. Johnny was convinced that Diego just liked the sound of his own voice.
Finally, it seemed Diego had reached the end of his literal fucking story, and he was now looking expectedly at his partner. When he was met with silence he pushed on, though he was obviously frazzled.
“F-focus on the dog, love. What’s another small animal-” but whatever Diego was about to say was cut off with a quick buzz courtesy of Johnny.
“Can’t say animal,” he reminded cheekily. Diego huffed before passing the card and switching to another.
Apparently, he was also switching up his tactics.
“Hm, ok it lives in the sea-” buzz “I-I mean it’s got a tail-” buzz “fuck-” buzz. By now Gyro was rolling on the floor almost in tears from his laughter while Diego fixed Johnny with a glare. Johnny only had to point at the timer for Diego to grudgingly move on.
His newest card read ‘Harry Potter.’
“Now this oughta be interesting,” Johnny muttered under his breath.
“Ok, HP this is-” buzz. Diego whipped his head around in Johnny’s direction, “What-”
“Can’t say HP. Stands for Harry Potter.”
Diego looked about ready to bite his head off, but Gyro saved him by pointing out the time again. Desperate, Diego passed the card and picked up the next, hoping for an easy word.
“Yes, we’ve got this one! Hot Pants just-” buzz. It seemed like the world had imploded on Diego’s face. Johnny didn’t even need to tell him his mistake this time.
The word was ‘pants.’
“Time!” Gyro called and Diego slumped on the floor like a sack of defeated potatoes. Meanwhile, the two ‘winners’ did quite the opposite. Gyro had plucked Johnny up from the floor and spun him around victoriously.
Their glee was only interrupted by a soft ‘ahem’ from HP who was now petting Diego’s slumped-over form.
“Actually, you two, it says in the instructions that points can be deducted if someone wrongly uses the buzzer.”
Gyro paused in his spinning as Johnny looked on confused. When had they- no, when had he used the buzzer wrongly and oh- Johnny already knew the answer. He had jokingly buzzed Diego after he said…
“Fuck,” Johnny cursed.
“I believe that puts us at a tie.” Diego’s head perked up at this.
“Cazzo Johnny, I should drop you,” Gyro grumbled but then just settled them both down gently with Johnny now in his lap. He reached out for the instructions and they both read on silently. Bitterly.
“Ah, actually it says here that whoever gives the best hints and passes the least amount of cards is the winner. HP, I guess that means you win,” Johnny said, letting out a big dramatic sigh.
“Really? Where does it say that?” Diego asked curiously, scooching closer to Johnny and Gyro for a glimpse of this new rule.
“It’s written here, right under fuck you, Diego Brando.”
“Oh har har. You know what, even if you made that rule up HP is always a winner in my book. She’s simply marvelous.”
Diego then made his way back to HP and peered up at her with pure adoration. HP rewarded him with a small kiss on his cheek and if Diego had a tail, Johnny was sure it would be wagging furiously. The sight was almost adorable, Johnny thought. “Get a fuckin’ room,” he said.
“Would you like a kiss too, amore mio?” Gyro whispered to him then, nuzzling his ear.
Johnny only hesitated a second before replying, “yes.”
“Well too bad. Kisses are for winners only.”
***
Days later Diego called to challenge them to a rematch. Johnny simply ended the call.