Work Text:
The Lord of the Files looked up as a heavy folder landed on their desk, causing the stacks of papers surrounding them to wobble precariously.[1]
They frowned first at the celestial figure that had appeared at the other side of the table, then at the package that had been dropped in front of them.
"What's this then?"
The archangel pressed her lips into a thin line.
"We believe this falls more into your area than ours."
"You believe, huh?" Dagon glanced at her, then stared back at the bundle. They prodded it carefully with a grimy finger. Who knew what gross, ethereal stuff might be clinging to the poor paper. When nothing happened - no sizzling, no burning, not even a trail of smoke - they flicked the cover open.
And frowned again.
They turned a few pages, glancing through them with preternatural speed.
"Why are you dumping this trash on me? That's about one of your underlings. Not to mention it's just dripping with... love." They swallowed and grimaced, then retched and spat on the floor.
It was a rather exquisite floor. Grubby and covered with a substance that looked - and smelled! - very much like decaying deep-sea creatures.
The archangel Michael however was neither impressed nor would she let go of her task that easily.
"Yes. Love. Of a rather… personal, worldly kind. Not the sort we promote amongst our own. Furthermore, this report also concerns a demon. And then there is the other thing. We really can't allow for this to sully our archives."
"Well, if that's how it is," Dagon's lips parted into a grin, baring a disconcerting amount of thin, pointy teeth. They reached under the desk to draw out an equally heavy folder. "You might as well take this with you."
Michael took hold of it daintily, her expression screaming for a batch of those disinfectant wipes humans were so fond of. She scanned a few pages and pursed her lips.
"This is about that demon -"
"Yes, yes," Dagon interrupted impatiently. They had been in the process of creating a new recompense form for field agents and were eager to get back to it. "And your former principality. It'd be a very amusing read, all the depraved things those two come up with. But the frankly disgusting amount of emotions are ruining the whole thing. Better get it out of here."
[1] Although not a single one dared as much as even to consider toppling over.