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An musters up as much determination as she can. “It’s super simple, I swear.”
She isn’t sure if Kohane believes her, especially with how her eyebrows are furrowed together in concern, but all she can do is try her best. “An-chan,” Kohane mumbles, already close to hiding her face in her sweater. “I don’t know if I can do this…”
“No! Really, it won’t be anything bad.” That much is true: An would never even think of doing anything that could make Kohane upset in any way. It’s just that- this time around, maybe she is being a little selfish. But it isn’t bad. Promise. “And I said it was a game, but there isn’t a punishment for losing or anything.”
At that, Kohane pauses and puffs her cheeks up in thought. An has the instinctive urge to pinch them, but for the sake of her argument, she holds herself back. It proves to be effective when Kohane sighs and leans back against the wall. “What are the rules again?” she asks.
Got her. An almost falls off of the bed in excitement- she barely manages to keep herself still by clinging onto the blankets. “We say what we like about each other,” she explains, “until the other person says stop. Or, uh, a keyword- like ‘out’ or something.”
Blankly, Kohane stares. Her face slowly turns red. “If I can ask,” she says, “you want to play this kind of game because…?”
"Mostly ‘cause I like you,” An says shamelessly. “And I want you to know how much I like you. Also, you’re cute when you react.”
That’s partially it, anyways. In reality, she might just want to hear more from Kohane, who normally shows her affection largely through her actions rather than her words. An really doesn’t have anything against it, since she’ll always welcome Kohane’s warmth with open arms no matter where she is, but she doesn’t think she can be blamed for at least trying to have her admit that she likes her.
Even just a little is fine. And An might be stretching it, but given that they’d only recently started dating, she wonders if Kohane would like this kind of opportunity: to talk freely without any particular reason. It’s exactly how she feels herself, since she would be happy with telling Kohane why she likes her as much as she wants to. She hasn’t had a proper chance to do so since she initially confessed.
So she leans forward until she can rest her hand beside Kohane’s. Their fingers brush past each other, and Kohane gently links them together. “I think you should go first,” Kohane finally murmurs.
A common, calculated Shiraishi win. “I don’t know where to start,” she sighs, rubbing her forehead dramatically. “I could talk about your voice first, since that’s how we first met, and how I knew you were the one I wanted to sing with. But past that, there are a thousand other things too, you know? I’ll have to pick and choose.”
Kohane is already blushing, with her round cheeks and her wide eyes and her messy pigtails. “I like how your hair is always tied higher on the right,” An continues absentmindedly. She tangles a strand of Kohane’s hair around her finger and twirls it idly. “Your hair is fluffy. I like how you hide in your clothes when you get nervous- and how all your clothes are oversized.”
“An-chan.” Kohane sniffles.
“Not a stop yet, right?” she teases. Until then, she’ll keep going. “I think I really like it when you hug me from behind, since I do that so much to you too. And I like how you work hard for everything, big or small. I’ve told you before, but you’re the best partner I could have. And the best girlfriend, obviously-”
Kohane falls forward so that her face is buried in An’s sweater. “Out,” she says, muffled by the fabric. “I can’t believe I had to say that.”
“You made it for over a minute!” An cheers, pointing at the clock. “That’s longer than Akito listens when I talk about you. You really are the best, Kohane.”
Peeking from the front of her sweater, Kohane looks up at her in careful silence. That much alone is enough for An’s heart to beat twice as fast, and for An to hear a phantom rush of wind past her ear, and for An to almost fall off the bed for a second time. Third time, if you count the one from an hour ago.
Shaking her head, An takes a deep breath. “Your turn next,” she says, squeezing Kohane’s arm.
So Kohane sits up, although she still stays pressed close to An’s side. She takes a deep breath and stares at her as boldly as she can. An is ready for this. An has been ready for this for a long time now, and it shows in how her gaze is fixed intently on Kohane’s face, how her hands cling onto the sheets aimlessly, how she chews down on her bottom lip in anticipation-
Kohane opens her mouth. “I like you, An-chan,” she says quietly. “I-”
“I'm out,” An says.
There’s no way. As it turns out, she isn’t ready after all, because even hearing Kohane say just that has her head light and dizzy and all over the place in a jumble of thoughts. Kohane is ridiculously adorable, ridiculously cute and perfect and objectively the best person in the world. Not even in the world- out of it, too, the whole universe. An is willing to fight anyone who thinks otherwise.
She falls onto her back and stares up at the ceiling lights. “Nope, not happening,” An says. “You’re too strong, Kohane. I know I said no winners, but you win.”
“Are you okay?” Kohane lies down right beside An, facing her and taking her hand in hers once more. “I could try it again-”
“It’s okay,” An replies weakly. “It’ll… it’s going to be my loss no matter what.”
In the end, that’s the sole outcome of the situation. No matter how many times she can see Kohane in a day, no matter how many times she can hold her hand and kiss her nose and sing with her, she doesn’t think she’ll ever be fully used to hearing that Kohane likes her back. Knowing that Kohane likes her back.
It’s somewhat of a miracle that they were able to meet, and even more of one that An gets to call Kohane hers. An isn’t always certain, but at the same time, she doesn’t have any reason to think otherwise. She turns her head to look at Kohane and laughs. Kohane smiles back.
“Let’s play again another time,” Kohane offers.
An gives her a cheeky grin. “For sure.”
Before then, An will practice, which means all she has to do is spend more time with Kohane. She’ll learn to calm her heart when she hears Kohane sing, and she’ll learn to take deep breaths when Kohane runs into her arms. It might be far from realistic, but she’ll try regardless.
In the end, it’s probably been a meaningless game since the start- not that knowing so will make An any less determined to win one day, though.