Chapter Text
Is been five months since Petey’s lab exploded and the two cats came to live with Dogman, and Greg couldn’t have asked for a better life.
He thought that having his ex-archenemy in his house would make everything unnecessarily awkward and that it could potentially make them fight again. It even scared him a little the thought that they fighting all the time may be enough to push Petey on the path of crime again but accepted the arrangement anyway because of Li’l Petey.
Greg went with it anyway because he loves the little kitten enough to accept everything he needed to if it means he can be with him everyday.
And surprisingly, living with Petey was not as uncomfortable and atrocious as he initially thought. Far from that.
Living with Petey was easy, warm and domestic.
Since Petey still can’t get a job, he took into his paws to help around the house as much as possible, he would clean, do laundry and cook their meals unprompted.
The first time it happened Greg tried to stop him, insisting they were his guests, but the cat dismissed it, saying they are staying indefinitely until he can get enough money to repair the lab. And for the look of the ‘rejected’ folder of his email, that would not be soon.
“We can’t be guests that much time” he said, frowning “and I’m not eating dog food anyway.”
And that was fine, because soon enough Greg found himself not wanting them to be guests either.
Where Dogman used to came from work to a cold, dark, empty house, he now open the door to the smell of a mouthwatering homemade dinner, crayons and drawings on the floor (Sometimes on the walls too), pieces of machines scattered on the edges and two cats waiting for him to eat together.
They made his house felt like a home and just the thought of it makes him so emotional he would start to tap his leg against the floor if he thinks too much about it.
He never thought he would feel like that again since Knight died, since Alice left, since he had to change his house. And there he was every night, relaxing on the couch after a long day of work, his belly full, and the sweet sound of Petey trying to get Li’l Petey to do his math homework, making him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
He even found himself anxiously waiting to get out of work when he used to do so much extra hours people thought he lived in the police station.
They want them to stay forever. They are his family now.
It even makes him feel like a bad dog because deep down he hoped no one ever hire Petey so the cat would never repair his house. It makes him feel so selfish he would start to whimper one moment to another, usually worrying Li’l Petey in the process.
So that’s something he prefer not to think about, he would just enjoy his happy perfect life and shake the sadness out of him like it was water.
Currently, he was taking his dirty laundry in a basket from his room to the first floor so Petey can wash it the next day. At the beginning it felt weird because the cats just dress occasionally so the dirty laundry is only his stuff and he knows there’s some grass or mud stains that needed some attention, but the cat was really clear with that.
“Please don’t make me beg to wash your clothes.”
Just the thought made Dogman red on the face at how embarrassing that would be, so he just let him take charge.
What happened next was just his own actions going back to bite his ass. Li’l Petey left some toys everywhere in his play before dinner, Petey told him to pick them up like a million times, but Greg wanted to be the fun dad and reassured the kitten he could just go to sleep since he seemed too tired, and he would do it.
And of course, he was planning on do it after taking out his laundry, but he wasn’t expecting to found a toy car in the stairs of all of places.
He has a good hearing and good nose, but his eyes are pretty normal. Petey and LP are the ones who can sort obstacles in the dark, and even they wouldn’t be able to notice a small dark blue car having a big basket in their eyesight.
So yes, to no one’s surprise, Dogman stepped on the toy car letting go a loud pained whimper, just to slip on its tiny wheels.
Petey was at the kitchen preparing their lunchboxes for the next day when the sound of his pain made him run to see if everything was fine, leaving him with a first row seat to Dogman rolling down the stairs, dirty clothes flying everywhere as the dog landed on his belly with pants tangled on his muzzle like a mischievous puppy trapped scraping the laundry. The big, watery eyes Dogman was making finishing the imagery.
“Oh” Petey said, his voice quivering a little “are you… Are you ok?”
Greg gave a weak thumbs up.
A smile started to grow in the cat’s face, but Dogman can clearly see his intentions to suppress it by how much his shoulders shivered. That didn’t last tho, because one second to another, a high-pitched laugh flooded the house.
Dogman was startled, freezing in his place at hearing it. He was fully expecting his characteristic ‘haw haw’ from when they used to fight, but instead, his laugh was a high-pitched sound that was a little like wind bells in a particularly windy day, smashing against each other in a disordered yet charming chorus. He even felt his cheeks warm a little because he never saw him laugh like that and it kinda felt like something he wasn’t supposed to see.
Petey can’t stop laughing, pressing his belly with both paws as trying to stabilize himself. The tingling sound was abruptly cut for a loud snort and the cat’s normally orange face became a strong reddish hue.
One snort followed the other, sounding like he was out of air. It was funny and deeply endearing, Greg felt his heart fasten a bit.
Dogman sits down on the floor, getting the dirty pants out of his face and looking at the cat from below, having to tilt his head a lot since Petey is really tall, waiting for him to open his eyes so he can talk to him.
It took a while, because Petey became so flustered he just turned around so Dogman couldn’t see him as he tried to normalize his breathing.
Greg opted to stand up and clean the mess in the meantime, hoping Li’l Petey’s sleep would be deep enough to drown the noise. When he was done, laundry basket full again in the place it belonged, Petey was rubbing the tears out of his eyes and panting a little, but finally out of his fit.
Just then, Dogman thought it was a good moment to talk.
“You don’t laugh ‘haw haw haw’” he signed opting to spell the laugh letter by letter, confusion clear in his face.
Petey crossed his arms, trying to act nonchalant after the long display of pure joy he just did. He even frowned, like that would make his face look less red and him less flustered.
“Of course not, dumbass” he insulted “that’s part of the whole villain gimmick. Who the fuck laughs haw haw?”
Well, Dogman thought he did.
They have known each other for a long time now, more as enemies than allies, but this revelation made him feel like he didn’t know him as good as he thought.
And he may not be as well educated in Petey’s behavior as he thought, but he knows enough about certain kitten to be sure he heard that laugh before.
The same sound, but more loud, free and even more high-pitched, was way too familiar to the dog ears.
“You laugh like Li’l Petey” the dog hesitated before sign, like he wasn’t sure if Petey knows, but he just rolled his eyes.
“Well, I hope so, we are the same person after all…” He thought about it for a second and then grimaced, looking less secure of his own words “…To some extent at least.”
Dogman tilted his head to the right, not sure what that supposed to mean.
Petey expression switched from his nonchalant attempt to something awkward. His body a little more tense, and his tail moving one side to the other.
“Right. I never told you where LP come from, did I?”
No, he didn’t. Even when Dogman had every right to ask where the fuck the biggest villain in the city got a kid from one day to another, he never actually asked and Petey never tried to explain it to him anyway.
Li’l Petey was Petey’s spitting image, so it was as clear as the day he didn’t just steal a child, so Dogman just assumed Petey had a lover, they had a baby, and the mother took care of him until she just abandoned him in Petey’s doorsteps.
Dogman thought that asking Petey about it would be crossing a line of privacy he didn’t even was close to and asking Li’l Petey about his mom was out of the table, so he just live his life thinking that was the official version. It doesn’t make a difference for him after all.
…Even if sometimes, when he is feeling under the weather, the thought of that mother appearing one day out of nowhere and taking his family away makes him so scared he almost starts crying.
Petey sighed.
“Ok, I should have done this long ago” he rolled his eyes “come here.”
They both walked to the couch and sit down, Dogman waited patiently as he saw Petey tried to gather the best wording, his shoulders were so tense he probably would end with a knot if he keep being stiff like that, his tail was puffed and moved erratically while his ears were up, pointing at the ceiling in parallel lines instead of the 120° angle they use to.
He seemed so anxious, Greg balanced the option of just tell him to keep it like that. Li’l Petey is his son, and that won’t change no matter where the kitten come from, if Greg doesn’t know for the rest of his life, that’s fine with him as long as they stay by his side.
Dogman put his hands up to start singing that, just for Petey to catch them mid air and put them down with his own. Making them hold hands, Greg is not sure if accidently or not.
“…Listen, Li’l Petey…” He started to talk, another sigh escaping his mouth “…Is not my son.”
Greg felt for a second like the air of his lungs just disappeared, while a cold feeling washed his body from head to toe. What the fuck did he mean he is not his son? Where the fuck the kid come from then?
Did he actually steal him and Greg was wrong the whole time?!
“…Well, I guess he is” he continued, hesitantly, like he just didn’t almost give him a heart attack with that revelation “…In the same way he is yours…” If he didn’t have his hands so firmly gripped with his owns, Greg would be signing frantically.
He barked softly, trying to get his attention to ask what the fuck he was talking about.
“Can you shut up for a second?” The ex-villain asked roughly, frowning and leaving behind how vulnerable he looked just a moment ago “this is important, mutt.”
Of course is important!
Dogman was panicking. Is Li’l Petey’s real family searching for him? The thought of having to give him away to their rightful parents made his stomach drop and he felt a little dizzy. Does he have to arrest Petey again? Child kidnapping is some serious stuff; he quite probably will not get a pardon again for the rest of his life.
His perfect, comfy life will go to shit.
He will be all alone again.
He is not sure he can handle all that once more.
But then what? Cover for Petey and just keep Li’l Petey away from his real family?
He can’t do that either!
“…Are you paying attention?” Asked Petey sounding pissed. Was he still talking?
Greg started to bark again, louder this time, as he tried to get his hands out of Petey’s reach. Of course, he has the strength to do it easily, but the part of him that had been living under the same roof as the cat for almost half a year now didn’t want to hurt him, even with the meaning of what he just confessed.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Petey asked, releasing his hands with a groan “you are going to wake up Li’l Petey” he said like he didn’t laugh louder just some moments ago.
“Who are Li’l Petey’s real parents?” Greg signed fast, feeling the words didn’t match his urgency levels, even when he was gesturing so wildly he was just a couple of centimeters away of slapping him.
Petey raised a brow, confused.
“…A cloning machine, I guess” he answered, his words grounded but with a hesitant undertone like he is not sure that’s the answer Greg was expecting.
And it wasn’t.
“What?!” He asked, making a point of sign three or four exclamation marks after the question. Louder hands, he needs louder hands.
“…You didn’t hear anything I said, did you?” Asked the cat, sighing tiredly.
“…Not since you said Li’l Petey is not your son” He confessed, his heart still pounding in his chest.
“…Greg” he said, seriously and making the dog’s heart skip a bit at his name’s use “Li’l Petey is my clone” he summarized “I bought a shitty clone machine, and it didn’t work as intended.”
…Oh.
That makes sense.
That actually makes a lot of sense. That explains why the kitten is so much like Petey.
Well, physically at least.
Dogman let go a long sigh at that, way too relieved to know he doesn’t need to get Petey to cat jail and Li’l Petey to his original home. They are still staying with him; they are still his family.
They are still his.
Everything was fine.
Petey waited for a stronger, bad reaction and frowned when he just saw Greg melting on the couch after the stress he just endured.
“Why are you so chill about it?!” He asked, weirded out by him “Don’t you think is weird? You are raising me!”
Greg raised a brow. Petey talked like they didn’t have seen weirder stuff.
“He’s not you” he pointed.
“Well, no” Petey admitted “but how can you be so relaxed after just found out?!”
“I’m just relieved! I thought you stole him from someone!” he confessed.
Petey looked him dumbfounded.
“Are you idiot?” He asked, but it lacked sting “don’t you think you will be the first one to know if an orange tabby kitten is lost, Mr. Policeman?” Dogman felt his cheeks warm. He was too caught up in his panic he just didn’t think about that.
Dogman howled, moving forward to tackle Petey in his anxiety, making the cat remove violently under him.
“Get the fuck out of me!” He yelled, but as Dogman actually started to whimper, he stopped moving, letting the dog accommodated on top of him, his head against his chest and Petey’s heartbeats melting his anxieties away.
The cat sighed.
Laying on the couch, Dogman on top of him, Petey wondered for a sec when his life became that.
‘…I still have to finish tomorrow’s lunch’
It wasn’t until much longer, days after, that Greg fully understood what Petey told him. No the clone thing, that’s not that important. But the fact that he never heard Petey’s real laugh before… It means all the other times were fake laughs.
Also he tried to not laugh at him when he fell, which was quite probably an attempt to hide it and not because he was actually worried for Greg.
So…
Why Petey doesn’t want Greg to hear him laugh?
It hurts him deeply because maybe when they were enemies that made sense, but now he thought Petey trusted him at least a little bit. They are living together and platonically raising a child after all.
So… Why can’t he low his defenses enough to laugh?
Does he laugh naturally with Li’l Petey? Is just Greg the problem?
Thinking too much about it will end making his head hurt too.
He wanted Petey to feel safe with him. Let him know he doesn’t need to fake his laugh or act like anything except himself. Pure, completely, unapologetically Petey.
But… How can he do that? He can’t just tell him ‘hey you can trust me’…
It didn’t help that his first instinct when he heard him laugh was questioning how it sounded…
Wait.
He may just be overthinking.
All he has to do is to make Petey laugh again, his real laugh, and then compliment him about it.
‘Your laugh sounds nice.’
And that’s all. He just needs to know Dogman doesn’t mind him laughing.
Easy peasy.
And just like that, he started to plan.
His first attempt were jokes.
“Knock knock” he hit his palm with his fist to make the gesture.
They were just finishing dinner and Greg thought it would be a good time to try, the mood was a little tense since Li’l Petey was making a fuss to avoid eating carrots and, since said carrots were chilling at the edge of the kid’s plate, one can only assume Petey may be a little pissed.
“Oh! I love knock knock jokes!” The kitten smiled widely, making Dogman smile too “who’s there?”
“Figs” he signed, his eyes passing from the kid to his papa, who was looking the interaction with a frown, surely still mad for his defeat at his own offspring’s hands.
“Figs who?”
“Figs the doorbell, it's not working!” His smile became goofier when finished the joke.
Li’l Petey’s bell-like laugh started to sound, joyous at the punchline. Petey seemed unimpressed.
“…It doesn’t make sense in ASL” he pointed.
Dogman tilted his head to the side.
“Fig and fix aren’t signed the same” he clarified. Li’l Petey’s laugh stopped.
“Why?”
“We are not doing this today” growled the cat, no patience left after the carrot war “I didn’t invent ASL, kid.”
“…It was a good joke, tho” Li’l Petey commented, tilting his head too.
“Knock knock” Dogman tried again, before the cat can continue complaining.
“Who’s there?!” Asked the kitten, louder this time.
“Says”
“Says who?”
“Says me!” The kid erupted into laughter again, Dogman moved his hips like how he would be swinging his tail, smiling happily.
“That one is simply bad!” Frowned Petey, looking at his son “why don’t you laugh like that at my jokes?”
That had Greg intrigued.
“I didn’t know you tell jokes” he signed, raising a brow.
Petey’s face became a little reddish.
“Well, I…”
“Papa’s jokes are not that good” Li’l Petey interrupted him.
Petey frown deepened.
“Knock Knock” he said loudly.
Greg smirked.
“Who’s there?” He signed.
“Leaf.”
“Leaf who?”
“Leaf me alone!” He smiled then, waiting for their laugh, but both of them stayed quiet.
“…That’s kinda rude” signed Greg, unsure of how to feel.
“Is bad, papa” Li’l Petey deadpanned.
Petey frowned again, his face blushing strongly at the failure of his joke, he crossed his arms and averted their gazes, like throwing a silent tantrum.
“Knock knock” smiled Li’l Petey.
“Who’s there?” Signed Greg.
“Uh…” The kitten looked around him “…Carrots”
The mention of that vegetable made Petey look grumpier.
“Carrots who?”
“Carrots pooped on your head!” The kid started to laugh, Dogman chuckled too, sounding park bark, part cough.
“That makes no sense!”
So. Yes, it was a fun dinner, but Petey didn’t laugh.
His second attempt was a movie.
Friday nights were movie nights since they started living with him. At first it was just Greg and Li’l Petey but, as the weeks passed, the other cat started to awkwardly stand by the side of the couch to see the movie too, just far enough to try to be ignored. That didn’t last, and now movie night was shared with him too.
So Greg thought it would be a good opportunity to choose a comedy for movie night. He just had to look for a good one that was also family friendly.
However, when he put the movie on and bring the popcorn, it didn’t seem to cater to Petey’s taste in cinema.
“What even is this?” He asked, “so far everything has been fart jokes.”
Li’l Petey on the other side, seemed to have the time of his life, laughing so much he was openly snorting, at moments being loud enough to drown the sound of the movie.
Greg was happy their kitten was having a good time, but it wasn’t working as he intended…
He still let go some chuckles from time to time. The movie wasn’t as funny as he thought but was still entertaining and some jokes were just his brand of humor.
As the plot moved forward Dogman just accepted the failure of his plan, opting for just enjoy the moment.
That was, until the villain of the movie kicked his assistant out of a building’s window out of nowhere, making the assistant smash on the floor off camera with a loud sound and a weak ‘I’m fine!’ coming from him.
“Haw haw haw”
Both dog and kitten turned around to see Petey laughing at the stupid and cruel joke.
“Papa you are mean sometimes” said Li’l Petey, no sting in his words, being more an observation rather than a scold.
“Oh, c’mon” the cat was smiling now “he is fine, he said it himself” he pointed the tv were the character just reappeared “see?”
“He has a cast on his arm tho”
Greg was not part of the conversation since he was still frozen in his place.
…Why Petey laughed ‘haw haw’ again?
And why Li’l Petey is not having the same crisis over it? He never laughs normally in front of him either?
He had to catch his own hands to avoid asking him directly. It would have been weird and cut the chill mood, so he avoid exteriorizing his worries.
What Greg failed to see when making his plans, but became completely flagrant to him at that moment, was that, if he never heard Petey’s real laugh until now, is because he always was able to control his laugh.
That one time he heard it, Petey tried to keep that control but failed because Greg falling down the stairs was so funny he just can’t stop himself.
So…
Plan three.
He needed to fall down the stairs again.
Dogman mentally patted himself in the back for having such ingenious idea but decided to just think about it later. It was movie night after all.
On the screen, the evil villain was the one kicked out the building this time and Petey didn’t seem to think it was as funny.
He forgot about his great idea for a couple of days, but at Monday’s night, when Petey asked for another basket of dirty laundry, he remembered and got his chance.
This time there were no toys everywhere. The kid did as his papa asked and picked them up before going to bed. But that’s ok, someone can stumble in nothing and everything, he just needed to make sure Petey is looking.
He remembered the first time as he took the basket and walked to the stairs, that time Petey was alerted by his own pained whimper. He can do that again.
The cat was waiting for the rice to be ready to pack their lunch and was just leaning at the kitchen counter, seemingly deep in thought.
Greg got down a couple of steps to make his fall more natural and let go a whine. This time tho, whatever was in Petey’s mind kept him distracted enough to heard it.
The dog frowned a little and let go another one, a little louder. Nothing. Greg sighed before letting go a howl a little louder than intended.
He would worry about Li’l Petey waking up, but had no time for that since he saw Petey jump at hearing him and Greg needed to hurry up because the cat’s reflexes are really fast.
The dog purposely mistook a step, making his feet slide and soon enough he was falling stairs down.
Except this time, instead of the smooth, almost painless fall, his leg bend below him and his elbow crashed against the steps as he fell, way more scandalous and less gracious than that last time, making him whimper loudly for real, smashing his body against the floor.
When he looked up, Petey was staring at him with some big eyes, but instead of the smile appearing in his face, he just saw worry and fear.
“Holy shit, are you ok?” He asked, running to check on him.
Greg felt the tears picking the sides of his eyes, his elbow burned and his legs hurt. The basket hit him on the hip when falling too.
“That sounded awful” commented the cat, helping him to sit. Greg kept whimpering, pained and sad because his plan didn’t work “what is with you falling down stairs? And why were you howling? What happened?”
He felt a blush creep on his face.
“I just wanted for you to laugh again” he signed, defeated. There was no point on hide it anymore. He was out of plans and the current one failed so spectacularly he had no desire of trying something else anyway.
Petey blinked a couple of times.
“What? Make me laugh?” He asked, sounding taken aback.
“Last time I fell down the stairs you laughed” saying it ‘out loud’ made him realize how dumb it was.
“I laugh all the time” Petey tilted his head to the side, confused.
“Your real laugh” he clarified, averting his gaze, way too ashamed.
They stay silent for a moment, Petey looked beyond confuse.
“You fell down the stairs… Because you wanted…” He stated, slowly, like trying to make sense “…For me to laugh at you.”
“For real” clarified Dogman again “for you to laugh for real.”
“…My real laugh”
“I just wanted to hear it again.” He confessed.
“But… Why?”
“Your laugh is… Pretty” he signed. Feeling startled at his own words. When planning that, he intended to say his laugh was nice as a way to encourage him.
But pretty…
Did he always thought that?
He remembers thinking it was charming, and that it weirdly fit him. But pretty was a more appropriate word, he realized.
“…I don’t know why you hide it” he keep going. He was not going to step back. Petey deserves to know his laugh is pretty.
Greg gathered his courage to look at him again, the cat completely red on the face and looking a little nervous.
“I don’t know either” he said, sounding uncharacteristically frank, like the layers surrounding him disappeared for a second “I guess as I grown up I just… Thought it didn’t fit with the evil image or something” he shrugged, like he wasn’t sure himself “I mean, is just too high and moronic, more meant for a kitten than a grown cat, you know?”
“It suits you” he signed, feeling he was wearing his heart on his sleeve, grounding his hands and making his words heavier, more meaningful “it suits your new you.”
Suddenly the link between ‘your laugh is pretty’ and ‘it suits you’ landed him in ‘you are just as pretty’. The discovery smashing him in the head and he felt his face warmer, his heart pounding in his chest.
“…And is cute that you and your son laughs the same” he added, trying to keep his revelations for when he has some alone time “he would love to know it.”
Petey’s brows frowned.
“…I guess is not so bad. You may be right…” he shrugged “…I don’t want the kid to grow up thinking his laugh is obnoxious or something” that sentence was enough for Greg to understood the real reason of his change.
He tried to swallow the lump in his throat.
“Is not obnoxious” he signed, just to make sure “neither of you.”
Petey sighed.
“Ok, ok. I get it” he rolled his eyes “I could try to stop faking my laugh.”
Greg smiled and tried to move his hips in his reflex of swinging his tail, but a sharp pain hit him making him whimper.
“…Wait, did you actually fell down the stairs? It wasn’t an act?” The cat asked, in awe. Dogman nodded shamefully “did you seriously almost broke your back just to hear me laugh? Are you dumb?” He asked but, after a long time, it sounded like he meant it.
Greg sweated.
“…Papa?” A drowsy voice asked stairs up “what’s happening?”
Oh shot, he actually woke him.
“Don’t worry kid, Dogman just ran and fell down the stairs” he rolled his eyes “you better remember we are not suppose to run on the stairs” he tried to lecture him, but Li’l Petey gasped, and his voice sounded anxious.
“Is he ok?!”
“Yep, but the stairs are covered in dirty clothes so please stay still, I will go for you” he stood up, walking around Greg to do that “we don’t want you to fall too.”
He came back shortly after with the kitten cuddled on his chest.
“Hi Dogman” he greeted, sounding cheerful “do you need help?”
Both cats helped him to stand up and sit on the couch. Well, Petey did but Li’l Petey wanted to help too so Dogman let him take his arm.
“You may call sick tomorrow if you can’t even walk by yourself” pointed Petey, going back to the stairs to put the clothes back in the basket.
He answered with a whimper.
“Don’t worry Dogman” smiled Li’l Petey “I can make you company.”
“You will go back to bed” corrected the other cat, moving the basket to the laundry room “you have school tomorrow.”
“But papa” the kitten complained “I’m not tired anymore and Dogman is sick! And I haven't missed school in like a million years.”
Petey was about to answer that, but Greg frowned and got his nose up, sniffing the air.
“Something is burning” he signed.
The cat freeze and then ran to the stove.
Thanks to Greg’s incredible nose, he was able to notice when the rice just started to burn and there was no smoke, so Petey saved almost all of it.
He gave Dogman a hot water bottle and some pain killers, and Li’l Petey kept him company until his papa finished to pack his lunch. The kitten then was dragged upstairs to went back to sleep and took a long time for Petey to come back.
For a moment Greg thought he fell asleep while reading Li’l Petey a bedtime story…
…Again.
But the cat was still up and approaching him, stretching his limbs over his head.
“How are you feeling, mutt?”
“A lot better“ he signed “it doesn’t hurt anymore, no need to call off work.”
Petey laughed and Greg felt his heart trapped in his throat when he heard the same high-pitch laugh he was trying to get out of him for days now.
“Good joke” he said then, startling him even more “that stupid police station will not collapse just because his ‘supa cop’ take a day off.” He mumbled rolling his eyes.
Dogman’s stomach seemed to make a flip, and he can’t stop himself from smiling.
Pretty was, indeed, the best word for Petey’s laugh.