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Ilya Rozanov had a library card.
Hold on, wait.
Ilya “reading the New Yorker is boring” Rozanov had a library card?
Shane hadn’t meant to snoop around, but they had ordered food and the place they usually ordered from only accepted cash. Something that Shane almost never had on him, but Ilya still did.
Ilya, who was still in the shower and telling him to grab his wallet to pay the delivery guy. It was no big deal anyway; they didn’t keep secrets from each other, and Shane didn’t exactly expect to find a picture of a random woman in there.
What he did find, however, was a library card. One with Ilya’s name on it, from the public library in Ottawa. Shane would recognise that logo anywhere, having spent much of his childhood in this place, unless he was busy practising hockey.
It wasn’t like he thought Ilya was stupid or anything. It simply had never occurred to him that Ilya would be getting a library card when they had so little time to spare between practice and travel.
He put the food down on the coffee table and didn’t have to wait long for Ilya to come back from his shower in loose sweats and a shirt thrown on, hair still damp, a grin on his face, clearly ready to finally eat something.
He only paused when he found Shane staring at him strangely. Not exactly in a concerning way, but more so like he was trying to figure something out about him. What it was, Ilya had no idea.
“What? Got something on my face?” He playfully asked.
Shane blinked once, looking at him with curiosity now.
“You have a library card.”
Ilya had expected a lot of things, but certainly not this.
“Yes, and?”
“You said reading the New Yorker is boring,” Shane tried, clearly busy solving this riddle.
“It is”, Ilya nodded, “they have more than just New Yorker. Is nice.”
That did not answer any of the questions Shane was having about this situation. He didn’t think that Ilya had kept it a secret from him, but it still felt surprising.
“How…why?” Shane didn’t even know what questions he needed to be asking here. How does one ask their boyfriend why they were in possession of a library card without making it sound like an accusation?
Ilya sat down next to him on the couch and elaborated anyway.
“You saw the post,” he gestured, though he already knew the answer. Shane never saw the post. Not until he or Hayden or someone else sent the meme, the video, the post to him. He was blissfully out of the loop, and Ilya loved that about him – most of the time anyway.
“Woman was dating a guy. She had library card. Guy said she wasn’t-“, he struggled to find the word for a second, “grown up enough. That library is only for kids.”
As if that explained everything Shane needed to know.
“You are a man, Ilya,” Shane tried to point out.
That actually made Ilya grin.
“Yes,” he nodded, stretching the word.
“And I never told you that libraries are only for kids,” Shane now began to wonder if he had ever made Ilya feel that way.
“No. But I wanted to…make a point, yes? Looked it up. Libraries are fun, Shane.” His eyes were genuinely lighting up now.
Something told Shane that Ilya didn’t get the same opportunities as a child to go to libraries that he did. His heart ached, but only for a passing moment.
“Yeah, I mean. They are,” Shane slowly nodded, “That’s why you got the card?”
Shane wanted nothing more than to fully understand Ilya now, because this clearly ran deeper than a random post online.
“Yes! Kids can get all the books. They have fun events, did you know?” Ilya was only getting started; he had clearly spent more time thinking about this than Shane could ever have anticipated.
“But so little money. Getting a card helps, shows city the library is needed,” Ilya looked pleased with himself.
“It does”, Shane nodded again, and then, softer, “that’s. That’s actually pretty nice.”
Ilya smiled, happy with himself.
“You should get one, too,” he told Shane then.
Shane probably still had his old one, somewhere, but agreed anyway, because he was pretty sure he’d just fallen in love with his boyfriend a little more.
Shane had thought that the tale of the library card was a thing of the past, until he found a letter from the Library of Ottawa in their mail.
“You forgot to return something?” He asked as he held up the letter for Ilya to see.
Ilya shook his head.
“Is probably just the donation receipt,” he explained, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Shane paused, looked at Ilya.
“You’re donating to the library?”
“Yes. Every month. Helping the programs for kids. They do good work.”
Shane was actually feeling a little weak in his knees. His silly, serious, big-hearted boyfriend was regularly donating to the public library.
Of course, he would. What else had Shane expected?
“I told the library we would be happy to come for an afternoon with kids. Just some reading and meet and greet,” Ilya dropped the news on him one afternoon. He was so casual about it that it didn’t even fully register with Shane at first.
“You did what?”
“Meet and greet. Library. It will be fun,” Ilya was grinning at him, clearly excited about this.
“Fun?”
“Yes, they are going to love you. Don’t worry.”
How could Shane possibly say no to that? The thought was slightly overwhelming, but Ilya would be there, so it would be okay.
It was okay. More than that, actually.
Ilya was his usual charming self. He loved kids, he was good with them, too. More than good, actually. And all the kids were excited to meet them, ask them hockey questions and do story time with them.
Shane went home exhausted, heart full, once again taken aback by Ilya’s determination to make the world a better place.
“An author mailed me. Asked if we want to write a children’s book about hockey and inclusion and diversity with them.”
At this point, Shane really should not be surprised anymore. He was trying to roll with the punches, but somehow this had reached new levels of utter chaos, in the best possible way.
“A book?”
“Yes, a book. The things they have at the library.”
Okay, Shane had deserved that one, if he was being honest.
After some consideration, they did write the book. Neither of them had any interest in the publicity, not really, but they both felt strongly about the cause, and the author was so kind and intent on creating something that mattered with them.
Ilya stared at the book in his hands for a long time when they got an advanced copy, like it was something impossibly precious.
“We did this,” his voice was soft, reverent even.
“Yeah, we did,” Shane smiled, leaning close enough to kiss his temple, acutely aware of how much this book meant to Ilya. He never would have agreed to helping with this, hadn’t he known how much it meant to Ilya that every kid who wanted to play hockey would feel accepted and loved.
They returned to the library once the book was released. Another story time, another afternoon with more children.
Ilya looked happy the whole time, patiently answering all of the questions, encouraging children to play hockey and go to the library more often, telling them how it had helped him with his English as well.
When they wrapped up, both of their hearts were full – Ilya’s because he had been able to create something meaningful, and Shane’s because he had been able to witness him find so much fulfilment and joy in the process.
“You did something good,” Shane pulled him close, once almost everyone was gone, then softer, “I love you."
Ilya smiled, then leaned into the kiss, happy, heart full.
He had done something good, indeed. And for those kids? He’d do it all over again.