Work Text:
Getting snowed into a city they weren’t supposed to be staying in is not ideal. Even more not ideal is every hotel in the area being booked. Everyone is freaking out. Non stop phone calls and panicked bribes to try to get just a few rooms to cram a whole team of hockey players in until the snow lightens.
And Ilya can’t get Shane on the phone to let him know. He had an off week, the metros on a winning streak that was rewarded with the whole week to themselves. Shane was going to spend it at home in Ottawa with his parents. They were planing to come watch Boston's game against Ottawa together. But now it’s canceled and Ilya is stuck on this bus trying to find somewhere to stay for the night. And the weather is terrible, worse maybe than he’s ever seen. And Shane isn’t answering his phone. So he might be starting to panic a little bit.
As the phone goes to voicemail again his frustration boils over and he really can’t help the “fuck!” That bubbles out when he hangs up for the eighth time in a row. It comes out slightly louder then he means it to but he can’t help that when he’s so concerned.
He does regret it though, because it gets the attention of one of his teammates a few rows up. “Common caption what are you panicking about. Don’t you live here? You could just go home and wait for this storm to blow over.”
Which then catches the attention of others on the team. “Yeah captain why don’t you just go home. You got no reason to be panicking.”
And spiraled into “actually why are we panicking can’t we just stay at your place.”
And that’s when the real panic starts. Because he does live in Ottawa. And he has no good excuse not to invite them over. But Shane is supposed to be home. And Ilya can’t get him on the phone to discuss this. And now that it’s been brought up he’s going to have to make a decision on his own. For both of them.
He likes his team. He really doesn’t think they will take him being queer or his relationship to Shane Hollander badly. But with the way Montreal reacted to Shane coming out, even without the knowledge of Ilya himself. Now he’s afraid to put that on Shane. And he's afraid to put that on himself.
Looking up to the front of the bus, coach is still on the phone but he’s also watching Ilya right back. He sees the tightness in his eyes and the tenseness in his body. Plans to find somewhere to stay are not going well. Most of the rest of the bus is glancing between coach, their own phones, and himself.
He ignores them and tries Shane again. To no answer. So he really needs to make a decision now. For both of them and for his team. Because they can’t sleep on the bus and they can’t drive far in this weather. There doesn’t seem to be another option but to take them home to the cottage.
He texts Shane frantically so he’ll at least have some kind of heads up that they are coming;
still worried that he’s not answering his phone. And makes his way to the front of the bus. “Coach, I live close. I have three spare bedrooms but lots of space. Please leave it for last option.”
And really there shouldn’t have been any hope left that they would find another option, coach has been searching for a few hours already. But any hope he had fell away with the look he got in return. “I’ve just about tried every other option we have, Rozanov. Text me the address and we’ll get going.”
It was a bit disappointing there was no way around this. And even more disappointing he couldn’t warn Shane properly. But a few minutes later the bus is moving again and the team is cheering, a few patting him on the back. Shortly after, they are driving painfully familiar streets.
He feels very anxious every part of his skin buzzing. He is different people when he is himself with Shane, vs. a hockey captain with his team. He’s never merged the parts of him before. He’s never even told them he’s bisexual yet. He’s definitely never even implied he’s in a relationship with his rival before. He just hopes he doesn’t get snowed into his own home with a bunch of bigoted assholes. Although it would be fun to force them to sleep on the cold bus while he and Shane stay in their nice cozy heated house.
It’s not that long before they are pulling up to the house. The coach catches his eye as they pull into the driveway. Ilya nods back to confirm the location and spots Shane’s boring sensible good in the snow car in the driveway in front of the bus. Coach stands to give a quick speech about bringing everything they might need because they could get snowed in. And to be respectful of the space they are borrowing. But Ilya ignores most of it, it is his home. He doesn’t need to bring anything in with him because it’s his.
Instead he tries Shane again. And thanks any god that might exist that he picks up. “Moya lyubov, I’m so sorry. I tried to call-”.
Shane cuts him off, not angry or urgent but strong. He’s sure Shane has been home making a plan since he got Ilya’s text. “It’s ok. Got your text right after you sent it. Sorry I meant to reply but I got distracted. Things are as set up as I can make them. Should be plenty of room.” Really he shouldn’t have been worried. As Ilya grabs his backpack and follows his coaches hand wave to the front of the bus to lead everyone off, Shane is in his ear telling him all the ways he spent the last hour prepping the house and ordering groceries for pickup that his parents were going to grab before the roads got worse.
It’s his turn to interrupt Shane and break into his very organized rant. “Moya lyubov, are you ok? Take a deep breath.” He spared a moment to think of how stupid he must look to his team walking down the aisle of the bus with a stupid love struck face. But he’s also satisfied because he hears Shane follow his instructions and the phone jostles as he nods. “We are here. We will unpack and come inside now. Ok?”
He hears Shane nod again and take another deep breath. Listens closely for Shane’s whispered ok before they hang up. Now it’s time for his own panic to start. Because he wasn’t really ready to have this conversation with his team yet. But he needs to warn them of some rules before going inside.
They are already rummaging around gathering their things. It's loud but he’s never had a problem being louder. “Hey! Listen up! Before we go inside you all listen closely! This is my home, there are ground rules. First of all, I am bisexual. There have been rumors but they are true.” A few people whisper to other teammates but no one outright says anything. “I am being very generous letting you stay in my home so if I hear anything bigoted from anyone you will be kicked out in the snow. Secondly, my boyfriend is gay and a hockey player. He has recently told his team and they are assholes. If I hear anything about him I will kick your ass and leave you to rot out in the snow. Am I understood?” So far no bad reactions. His best friend on the team, Cliff Marlow, is smiling which is also a good sign.
“And one more thing. Do not move the furniture! My boyfriend has everything exactly where he likes it. Try not to move anything in the fridge. Really, try to put everything back where it was found. Do not go snooping through private rooms. I will also throw you out for that.” Nothing else is coming to mind now. He’s sure there’s a million other things he should say right now but the biggest things are out and-
“Is that Shane Hollander?”
Ilya spins to look out the front window, and of course Shane is standing in the cracked doorway on the front porch in a hoodie and socks. They make eye contact and Shane raises an eyebrow at him. His face is warm and he has to look away before he’s blushing. “Ok.” He says to himself. “Alright lets go it’s fucking freezing!” He says louder to the bus before stepping off first.
It only takes a few steps for Ilya to make his way to Shane who takes a step further into the cold and wraps his arms around Ilya’s neck. “How’d they take it?” He asks softly. And all Ilya can do is nod back. The rest of the bus is unloading their luggage from the under bus compartment. And with how cute it is that Shane has to be light on his toes to be in Ilya’s face, he can’t help wrapping his arms around his middle and kissing him. It’s so comfortable, even with the audience. They slip together like they were never apart. It’s his favorite thing in the world. So when he gets the chance he braces his arms around Shane’s waist and lifts him off the ground. A startled laugh bubbles out of his lips when he wraps his legs around Ilya’s waist, and it’s the most beautiful sound he has ever heard.
He stomps in the door dropping his shoes by the entrance and depositing Shane in the counter around the corner. “Well that’s one way to come out I guess.” Shane’s still laughing. Which makes Ilya feel lighter about the whole situation.
“I will get them settled and I will be back for you. Stay there, like beautiful statue of Greek god.” Shane’s laughing harder now and rolling his eyes at the statement. But he looks light when he nods and it make Ilya feel secure enough to walk away.
The team is just finishing unpacking when he returns to the door. Half the boys are looking at Marlow the way they were looking at him when he spoke on the bus. The prospect of another organized speech he wasn’t there to hear makes him nervous but Cliff is his friend. He has to trust there’s nothing bad going on.
He opens the door wider as people approach letting everyone into the foyer. “Shoes off please. You can put your things along the wall for now.” He steps further into the house, settling in the space between the living room and the kitchen. Just in sight of Shane on one side and their guests in front of him.
Cliff is leading the pack again walking towards Ilya slowly swiveling his head in every direction talking in the house. “Man this is a beautiful place.” He says coming around the corner to meet with Ilya.
The rest of the team is walking up behind Cliff to join the conversation. Ilya feels crowded and a bit uneasy. Before he can respond Shane is jumping in. “Thank you.” He says mildly, catching the attention of anyone willing to look. “ I had it built years ago. It’s a bit of an escape most of the time but I guess it’s a safe house sometimes too.”
He loves Shane so much. He loves him with every bit of his body. And seeing him and Cliff laugh together about their accidental vacation at Shane and Ilya’s home, feels like the best thing he’s ever seen.
Some of the other guys are laughing too. Some are still looking around. Jana, one of their newer team members has made his way fully into the living room. He’s admiring the view out the big glass windows, and Ilya can see the way his mouth shapes a Wow as he looks around.
For the first time since that first day he spent at the cottage he feels out of place, overwhelmed. But it’s worse now. Because now this is his home. He feels a pressure against his leg and follows it to Shane’s outstretched leg poking his thigh. “Hey why don’t you go get showered and changed and I can show everyone around and get people settled in?”
Ilya doesn’t want to leave Shane alone with his team. But he needs to step away. There’s a pressure building in his chest that feels very tight. So he nods, collects his back pack and squeezes Shane’s foot that’s still against his hip. The walk up the stairs to their bedroom is short but he’s suddenly very tired. He feels like his muscles are drooping off his body. And he’s never wanted a nice hot shower more in his life.
Ok. This is fine. Their home is taken over by an entire team of his rival hockey players. But he’s ok. It’s fine. Ilya just came out to them for the both of them. And that’s ok. No one has had a bad or dangerous reaction to that. So he’s good.
But now Ilya is gone to take a shower and there’s a large group of men watching him. “Uh, hi. I’m Shane. We’ve met. Kinda. Anyway, welcome to our home.” He should probably show them around. He slides off the counter and takes a step towards the group.
Cliff Marlow, Ilya’s best friend on the team, and someone he’s not really met off the ice takes a step towards him. It’s not aggressive but it makes him pause anyway. Until he’s holding his hand out for Shane to shake. “Hey man I’m Cliff. Rozy and I are friends. And uh sorry about that time I, like, broke you.” It’s so awkward. But it’s so funny. Because apparently everyone is feeling the stupid tension in the room.
But the greeting is so funny. And most of the room is laughing now. And the handshake is a normal amount of firm and politely shaken. The coaches come up to greet him next just as politely. Which if he’s honest is a step up from his own coaches just getting the knowledge he’s gay. After greeting most of the team, a few more standoffish than the rest, he shows the bus driver and coaches to the three spare rooms and directs the rest of the room to the two blowup mattresses and couches piled high with blankets and pillows.
They’ve all been shown to the half bathroom close to the entrance. And the full bathroom down the hall by the guest bedrooms. Things are pretty quiet not many people in the room talking when one of the older guys he can’t remember the name of speaks up. “ So Hollander, your gay huh.” And as uncomfortable as the quiet was. This question is so much worse.
He wishes Ilya were here but he can faintly hear the water still running. The sudden movement is a bit startling but he lets out a chuckle when Connors takes two steps forward and slaps the other player on the back of the head. There’s a quick exchange of ‘what the fuck was that for’ and ‘ your being rude to our host’ before things calm down again.
And really that reaction isn't anywhere near as bad as he was expecting. “Hey man I appreciate the defense but I’d really prefer we don’t start any roughhousing and break anything.” He says it lightly in the hopes of truly conveying his gratitude. And with the way Connors takes a step back raises his hands up and laughs, he thinks he understands. “But, uh, yeah I guess to answer that question, yes I am gay.”
It feel insufficient but that’s what he’s got with the stilted question asked to begin with. Some of the guys are nodding along to his answer just to have something to do. The original player opens his mouth to speak up again and Shane can feel his whole body bracing for the next question. “Roz said on the bus you told your team and they didn’t take it well. The fuck does that even mean?”
The question makes his already wound body freeze in place. It’s not the kind of question he was expecting. He has to think about how he can answer that to another team. But really what does it matter that much, it’s not like he’ll be with Montreal much longer anyway. So fuck it. “Uh, well. The guys were very uncomfortable I guess. Not exactly sure why. But, uh. I’ve basically been replaced as captain without them actually taking the title away. If they take the title then they have to explain why. and I’m still doing all the work calling plays but it can’t come from me because no one will listen.” They're all watching him from the living room. He’s trying to distract himself from how uncomfortable this is by prepping the chicken to go in the oven. “Practice is getting kinda brutal. I think all of my ribs are bruised right now-”
“From your own teammates? What the fuck!” He’s not sure who asked but he appreciates the sentiment.
“Yeah I’m not really supposed to say but we’re not really on good standing right now so whatever. But they’re trying to trade me mid season just so they don’t have to deal with this situation.” And that statement more then anything else he’s said, sends the room into a spiral. It’s uncommon for a team to trade mid season and even more uncommon for that trade to be the team's star player.
He hears a chorus of swears and outrage and it makes him feel good to hear. Someone else in the crowd asks if his team knows about Ilya and he has to explain that they hate him more than they hate Shane himself. And someone else asks who else does know. So they don’t say something to the wrong people. Of course the list for that one is very short. Just consisting of his parents. And the slightly longer list of people that know they are seeing someone at all. Hayden and Jackie, Rose, Svetlana, Marlow. And that’s it.
They take a while to process that before someone asks another question. “That’s not a very long list. So I would assume you guys haven’t been together long. But you live together so…how long have you and Roz been together?” Shane doesn’t realize he’s smiling for a minute. This question is fun to answer without the stress of coming out to his parents.
He wishes they spent less time denying feelings for each other and more time loving each other. But he does love their timeline. They have been together their entire adult lives. “Well I guess that depends on your definition of together. We have been exclusive and officially boyfriends for a little over a year.” A few people in the room whistle like that’s the shocking part. “But there have been feelings involved for about four or five years.” The reaction is about the same but there are more people in the room looking shocked. “But we’ve been hooking up for almost a decade now so I guess it’s up for interpretation.”
A few seconds after he finishes speaking Ilya comes walking out of the bedroom. He’s wearing a pair of Shane’s dark blue sweatpants, no shirt, hair still wet. He wants to lick drops off his shoulders. But Ilya gives the room of players a strange look and Shane looks over to see their shocked faces trailing Ilya across the room.
“Yes mom I will ask him, give me moment,” he hadn’t even realized Ilya was on the phone. “Shane, mom has been calling, you don’t pick up. She is at store wants to know if you want sixteen or seventeen bags of chicken.” The meaningful look Ilya shoots his way brings him right back to their first time at the cottage together when Shane made so many burgers. It makes him laugh. “Here, talk to your mother. Yuna, I pass you over now. Ok, love you too.”
With an eye roll Shane takes the phone from his hands and tries to understand why his mom thinks they need quite that much food. Out of the corner of his eye he watches some of the team in the other room converse with themselves. He feels a heavy weight at his back. And heavier arms wrap around his waist. Ilya lays his head on his shoulder but his wet hair brushes his neck so he has to shrug him off. He doesn’t leave entirely, instead shifting his position to resting against Shane’s back, where his neck is safe from any contact.
It’s something that Shane is so grateful to Ilya for. He knows he can be a lot especially when he gets overstimulated and uncomfortable. But Ilya has gotten really good at seeing his limits and avoiding them. They’ve lost most of the audience now and by the time he’s telling his mom he loves her and hanging up a few of them are maneuvering pillows on the couch.
“Please tell me she’s not buying seventeen bags of chicken?” But really he would be lying if he said that.
“We’re going to be eating chicken for months.” The groan Ilya lets out at this response makes Shane laugh and makes Ilya kiss him.
After the food is done and Shane yells at everyone that tries to eat on the couches they gather around every inch of the living room to eat. He’s been to team dinners before and they have been fun, but he feels so wound up now. Cliff is sitting on one side of him and Shane on the other which is a secure position. He’s starting to relax when coach speaks up.
“Thank you for opening your home to us boys. I don’t think any of us realized there was this much personal secrecy that we’d be forcing our way into.” He wants to shrug it off, play it cool. Say no problem and move on. But it would be a lie. Because it has been a very stressful few hours.
And he feels himself tense again slowly when there’s a knock at the door before it opens. Yuna and David are at the door arms full of groceries. “Hello boys, could a few of you help us bring stuff in please?”
He loves Yuna. She is not like his own mother but she is just as good. A brilliant woman who has spent every moment since they have known each other making sure he knows how much she loves him. She is also a manager. An observer. She can see right through him now that she knows what to look for. And he watches her eyes squint suspiciously when he flinches at the way his coach pats his shoulder when he passes.
And it’s fine. He’s good. No one had been bad about any of this. It’s just that he’s extra paranoid right now. And he’s afraid of the conversations he hasn’t had with some of the people in this room that he should have had before now. He’s really afraid of Cliff and what he’s really thinking.
She gives him a meaningful look before she leaves and he knows she’s going to bring it up when she gets the chance. But there are so many other things to worry about right now. And when they find themselves in bed together finally away from everyone he’s so wound up it’s hard to lay down.
They’re going through their routine in the bathroom when there’s a knock on the door. Shane was about to wash his face but hadn’t started yet. And Ilya has a mouth full of tooth paste suds. So Shane gets the door. He doesn’t see who it is but they talk for a minute and then Marlow is stepping inside.
“Hey man. Was just hoping we could talk for a minute?” He looks normal. Nothing unhappy or uncomfortable. Well more uncomfortable than him being in his and Shane’s room. So Ilya just holds up a finger and turns to finish brushing his teeth.
When he’s leant over the sink washing out his mouth Shane walks back in and presses a kiss to his temple. It gives him strength. He leaves the bathroom and Shane cracks the door closed behind him. Giving space for this conversation without leaving the room.
Marlow is standing looking out at the lake hands in the pockets of the jeans he’s still wearing and looking too deep in thought. “Didn’t know you could think this hard.” He’s being an asshole but that’s half their relationship.
“Oh fuck off.” He’s laughing but he turns serious quickly. “So listen, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry you had to do all this, the coming out thing, the way you did. That was kind of taken away from you and that sucks.” The pause lingers for a moment and Ilya was about to say something to reassure Marlow that he’s ok when he continues. “And I’m not like, mad or anything that you never told me. But I am glad to know. Because you're like my best friend. And you had to carry a whole long term relationship alone for so long. I would have liked to be someone you felt safe to tell. But I understand why I wasn’t. Hockey is not, like, great for that. And I talked to the guys before we came in and told everyone to shut the fuck up with any bullshit. And no one really had anything bad to say so-“
It’s the most words Marlow had said this quickly and all at the same time. And they are some of the best words he’s ever heard. Ilya just had to hug him about it. It settles something in him to have this approval. “Thank you Marley. You are my best friend too. And I-“ this stupid lump in his throat needs to fuck off. “Thank you.”
They make plans to use the gym together in the morning. Just like they always do. Then he leaves and Shane comes back out of the bathroom ready for bed. Ilya feels much calmer. When Shane merges their bodies together, sleep comes easy.