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Royal Animal Crackers

Summary:

Count Lecter meets Pop Star Will Graham

Notes:

I know many other stories to update. Got inspired. I do not know how to insert/write stage directions but I wanted to give somewhat of a visual what is happening on stage. I know nothing of opera but what I gleaned from the Looney Tunes cartoons, so there will be mistakes.This is a fun fluff piece..ugh..again. Not beta.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

"Please, Hannibal! Please, please, please!"


"No Mischa."


"Please, Hanni! Don't be a stuffed shirt!"


"Mischa, You are a countess. Begging and whining are not becoming to a member of royalty."


"You never listen to me!"

Mischa throws herself down on Hannibal's bed. Her arms crossed her eyes staring hard at the ceiling and she huffs out an exasperated breath. She mumbles something under her breath. Her brother hears it regardless.

"I am not old before my time. The cultural festival is exactly that. Culture in the form of elegance and taste.Besides this year is an operatic competition for charity. All the finalists have been selected and notified."

"I suppose they were picked by you."

"Yes by me. After all, I am the chairperson of the event. When you run it, you can use your definition of culture."

Hannibal continues to write in his journal acting as though he is ignoring his sister. The only sound in the room is the scratching of the pen on paper for a brief moment.

"By then I'll be old and crotchety! I'll be like..well..you. I want to have some cool fun now! When I still can enjoy it.Remember fun, Hannibal?"

She sits up looking at her brother.Her blonde hair mussed from the bed.

"I still have fun. Not how you define it but I have been told I am fun to be with besides, I am not having this so called saltine cracker as entertainment for the festival. Even if the Ritz crackers are your favorite group, that is my final word on the matter."

Hannibal stops writing just for a moment before he continues. He is a little miffed by the teenager's remarks. He does so know what fun is.

"They are called Graham's Animal Crackers or G.A.C for short, for your information! I am not the only person who likes them."

" G.A.C how revolting. Who would call themselves after a child snack?"

Mischa opens her mouth to reply when Hannibal holds his hand up for her to remain quiet.

"That was a hypothetical question; I am not curious to know the explanation for it."

Mischa scoots off the bed. She flounces out of the room in a huff while Hannibal puts down his pen. He rubs his face wishing there was somewhere else he could go for some peace and quiet. He knows this topic will be revisited again. Luckily for the young count, his sister will be returning to school in a fortnight.


 

Six months later

Hannibal hears a gentle knock on the study door before Richard enters.He is head of Lecter security for the family. Hannibal looks up from the book he is reading.

"Yes?"

"Sir, a person trespassing on the property. They are on the north end near the lake. I haven't dispatched anyone to remove them. You wanted me to inform you when this happened again."

Hanibal closes his book slowly. There have been several poachers on his property as of late. The count decides he feels in the mood for a little hunting of his own.

"I'll take care of it, Richard. Thank you."

Richard nods as he is leaving the room.

Hannibal drives the range rover a mile or so from the trespasser. He takes his shotgun out laying across the crook of his arm. The count nonchalantly strolls over to the edge of the woods. He sees a boy sitting underneath a tree in a blanket. The boy is strumming a guitar with a pencil held between his teeth. Hannibal can not see the details of his face.His head is bent slightly with a mop of chocolate curls falling forward following his glasses that have slid to the near tip of his nose.

The count stalks quietly toward his prey; he stops shy of the trespasser to look closer. The trespasser is not a kid but rather a young man with a lithe frame. The boy, he still looks too young to be called an adult Hannibal decides, is wearing a long sleeve t-shirt underneath a worn out blue plaid flannel shirt and distressed jeans.

Hannibal stands near him listening to the song the boy seems to be composing. This boy is not a poacher after at all. More than likely, he wondered over from the national park that adjoins the family property. A few years ago Hannibal donated some of the family's lands, in honor of his deceased parent's memory, to become a national park. The count cocks his head clearing his throat.

The trespasser looks surprised as blue eyes meet his maroons ones.The pencil drops from the boy's lips as he looks at the sharply dressed man before him. The man's blonde hair slicked into place. The severity of the haircut accentuates the man's cheekbones and then mouth. He is dressed in thick brown pants, a hunter green sweater with a shotgun lying open across the crook of his elbow. Will, a native of the south, is not unfamiliar with gun-wielding property owners.

The trespasser swallows with a dry click fear in his eyes as they move down Hannibal toward the ground.The count smiles despite himself.

"I am sorry to disturb you, but you are trespassing on private property."

The boy's eyes widen as he stands to lower the guitar to the blanket. He pushes his glasses up to the bridge of his nose. 

"S-Sorry, I don't speak the language."

 Will gives a lopsided smile. Hannibal smiles back.

"I apologize, I did not realize you were a visitor to our country. I said I am sorry to disturb you, but you are trespassing on private property."

Hannibal says moving slowly forward to look down at the pages the boy has marked on.

"This isn't a part of the national park?"

Hannibal shakes his head no.

"Oh, I wondered why such a beautiful spot seemed so devoid of people. I am so sorry; I thought, I was still inside the park..let me get my stuff and I'll go!"

The boy bends down flustered grabbing things shoving them into a backpack. Lovely in his fear and submission to leave, the count stored away the memory for later.Hannibal reaches down picking up the sheet music that has blown toward him.

"Are you a student of music?" he asks as the trespasser's fingers brush his as the boy reaches for the paper.

The boy blushes shaking his head no.

"No. I am not a student.I am here for the charity event."

"Oh, how wonderful, then, let me introduce myself, I am Dr. Hannibal Lecter."

He holds out his hand as the trespasser looks at before wiping his hand on his jeans. The boy grasps Hannibal's hand in return firmly.

"Will."

"Just Will?"

"Yeah, just Will. Are you related to Count Lecter, the patron of the cultural festival?"

"I am one in the same. I prefer the title Dr because I have earned it. But since I am calling you, just Will, please call me Hannibal."

"Alright, Hannibal."

"Do you mind if I sit?"

"Oh no please."

Hannibal gracefully sits down. Will plops down beside the count, to the amusement of the older man, on his blanket. Hannibal lays the shotgun down on the ground looking out over the lake.

"I used to come here often as a child, but I haven't been here in years. I forgot the beauty of it."

"Do you often patrol your property, Hannibal?"

Hannibal chuckles.

"No, not often but we've had trouble with poachers as of late. I came to investigate the situation. Are you a hunter Will?"

Hannibal watches the profile of the younger man beside him. His eyes fixated on a spot across the lake and cheeks rosy from excitement or the cold wind blowing. How very classical and sweet, the Count thinks.

"No. I am a fisherman. My dad and I fished often. I love the peace of it and the solitude.I fly fish when I get the chance."

He smiles a shy smile glancing at Hannibal.

"Are you a hunter?"

Hannibal gives a toothy smile.

"Most definitely but no today."

"Lucky for me." quips Will.

"For us both." Hannibal returns the quip with a chuckle.

They sit quietly for a few minutes. Will fidgets with the brown grass while Hannibal watches the younger man without looking directly at him.

"I am glad to see younger people attending the charity event. My sister feels the classics are dull. I need to have a more modern approach, she says."

"How old is your sister?"

"She is twelve."

Will chuckles looking over his glasses at Hannibal.

"Well, there you go, when I was that age, I didn't appreciate the classics either. But we need the connection to the past to learn about ourselves and the past."

"Well spoken, I agree with that statement. I might try using that argument the next time we discuss the festival. Would you like to have lunch with me? I wold like to continue our conversation."

Will smiles and blushes. He nods his head a little.

"I would love to, but I have to be at an appointment in a..." Will look at his phone. "A little less than a half hour. Could I have a rain check till after the concert?"

His eyes look hopeful at the maroon ones.

"I understand. Let me give you my mobile number. After the event, call me when you are free."

"Sure."

Will hands the phone over to Hannibal. He places his information into the phone. After a few more hesitant words spoken the couple separates going in different directions.


 Three days later

Mischa gives a long-suffering sigh as she claps for the umpteenth opera group. Hannibal gives her a stern glare. She straightens in her seat and smooths her cream colored gown. Hannibal nods at her in approval. The master of ceremonies comes out to announce the final performance of the evening.

"Our last performance is a mixture of different singers from America. The primary virtuoso is William Graham."

Hannibal straightens in his seat looking at the stage. Could it be the boy he met at the lake? The one who has occupied his thoughts enough where Mischa has commented on it?

Hannibal hears a small squeal from the audience below. He frowns when he hears another.Mischa gasps as she stands up. Hannibal looks at his frozen sister. She seems entranced looking at the stage below.

"Mischa! What is wrong? Sit down for heaven's sake."  he hisses to her.

Hannibal hears a whisper from her.

"Could it be him?"

The count looks at the program. The song is called Boeheim Rapshady .Hannibal's attention is drawn back down to the stage below when the music begins.


 ( A dark stage below.)

Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide
No escape from reality
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy

 (The stage lights flick on  over a cluster of singers at upper stage left then goes out. Stage lights turn on over another group of singers upper stage right.)

Because I'm easy come, easy go
A little high, little low

(Will walk out from the group singing this line. He dressed only in a blue shirt and tailored navy suit. Curls tamed and smiled on his face. He looks toward Hannibal's box smiling. A pulse of squeals and screams are heard from the audience below.)

Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me


Mischa squeals jumping up and down.

"It's him! It's him! Will from G.A.C! Oh my God! Hanni!"

Hannibal grabs Mischa pulling her down to her seat. He growls his threat to her.

"If you continue with this behavior I will take you out of here! Do you understand?!"

Mischa enthusiastically nods as her smiles broaden. Her small hand now in a fist beating her brother's leg in excitement. Hannibal looks back at the stage below.

Will walks forward as he continues to sing. His eyes scan the audience sweeping across before landing on Hannibal's box. Hannibal is drawn into the very modern rock opera before him.


 (Spotlight following Will as he walks around the stage.)

Mama, just killed a man
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he's dead

(Will looks directly at Hannibal smiling as though they share a secret. It sends a bolt of warmth to Hannibal's groin.)


Mama, life had just begun

But now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine
Body's aching all the time
Goodbye everybody I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama, ooo (anyway the wind blows)
I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all


I see a little silhouette of a man


(A spotlight turns over a group of singers, upper middle stage, as they sing the next verse.)


Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango


(The spotlight goes off and on stage left, another spotlight illuminates another group of singers, to the side of stage left.)


Thunderbolt and lightning very very frightening me


(The spotlights cut out and on between the two groups for the next seven verses sung.)

Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo Figaro - magnifico

(Will's spotlight follows him as he walks stage right toward a table.)


But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me

(The table is now in the spotlight as the singers dressed as lawyers sing the next lines.)


He's just a poor boy from a poor family


Spare him his life from this monstrosity

(Spotlight back on to Will for next verse)


Easy come easy go will you let me go

(A spotlight turns on further upstage right of a group in black judge'robes as they sing next line, followed by the lawyers brought back into the spotlight for the answering line sung.)


Bismillah! No we will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go let me go

Will not let you go let me go (never) ( Will moves toward the judges as though imploring them as he sings back to them in answer.)

Never let you go let me go
Never let me go ooo


No, no, no, no, no, no, no (Judges)


Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go (Will)
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me (All singers)

(The whole stage is lite up as everyone sings the next two lines.)


For me
For me

Suddenly, a blast of an electric guitar is heard and then accompanist start to play.


 The teenagers in the audience stand up and yell in enthusiasm. Some running to the stage with phones in hand.

Will walks toward stage left singing to the audience but his focus on Hannibal's box. Mischa increases her pounding enthusiasm as Hannibal knows there will be a huge bruise there but he doesn't care. His attention is fully on the man singing below him.


 (Lights are on Will, judges and band members.)


So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh baby, can't do this to me baby
Just gotta get out just gotta get right outta here

(The whole stage is lit as the entire ensemble sings)


Ooh yeah, ooh yeah

(The music starts to soften as the lights go off except for the spotlight on Will. He sings the last verses as he moves toward the audience. He smiles at his fans and then turns the smile back up to Hannibal)

Nothing really matters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters nothing really matters to me

Anyway the wind blows


 The teenagers scream as the security force tries to keep them back from the stage. The audience claps standing up; Hannibal follows as Mischa claps her hands bouncing just slightly.Hannibal shakes his head smiling wide, as Will and the whole group take their bows before exiting the stage.


 A few minutes later

Hannibal is standing by a very excited Mischa to give the awards out to the finalists. Mischa is insisting on coming down for the presentation asking it's only a Countesses duty, she states chin jutted up. Hannibal snorts then cover it with his hand when Mischa glares at him.

Hannibal gives a small speech thanking everyone who donated time and money toward the main charity for the endorsement of the arts in the Lithuanian schools. Every winner receives prize money toward their favorite charity. The winners are chosen by the finalists are by a panel judges for technique and originality. 

Will's group wins third place with his charity for ASPCA. Will smiles waving to the audience as he walks toward Mischa who hands him the award check clasping his hand for a picture together. She reluctantly gives up his hand after Hannibal physically pulls her hand off the young singer's hand. The audience laughs. Hannibal jokes about teenagers as he prepares to give the other two awards.

After the final bow, the performers head to the dressing rooms to change for the reception. Will saunter up to the count and countess. Mischa is silent for once. Hannibal turns toward him smiling; he holds out his hand as Will shakes it. Their hands linger  Mischa notices.

"Congratulations! You were wonderful! I enjoyed the rock opera more than I thought I would. Why didn't you tell me that you were in the program?"

Will shrugs looking down at his feet. He looks back.

"I didn't want to influence any judges besides sometimes it's nice being just Will. Thank you. I am glad you had fun despite it being modern. But my background is in.."

"In classical music as a pianist!" 

Mischa finishes enthusiastically after coming out of her trance.Hannibal throws her a look for her rudeness, but she ignores him.

"Mr. Graham, you must ride with my brother and me to the reception."

"I don't want to be any trouble."

Will smiles looking at Mischa. Hannibal opens his mouth, but Mischa answers for him.

"Oh, no trouble at all! Right, Hannibal?"

Hannibal raises an eyebrow to Mischa.

"May I answer now?"

The teenager rolls her eyes nodding her head.

"Thank you. Yes please do take our invitation."

"Sounds great. We can discuss lunch plans."

"That we can Mr. Graham."

Hannibal places a hand on Will's back steering him towards the exit door with a Mischa texting her friends as she follows.

 

Notes:

I know Will's rock band is cheesy but hey, low hanging fruit and all.I love Queen's Bohemium Rapshady. However, I listened to Panic at the Disco's version of the song 'cause I love them too.

Mischa beating the hell out of Hannibal's leg is based on my mom and her uncle. My mom saw the Beatles in concert, it cost her $3.00 (true! I have seen the actual ticket stub. Can you imagine?), with her Marine Captain brother. He told her if she screamed ( they are from North Carolina) that he would yank her outta there. So my mother beat his leg while everyone else screamed. He should have just let her scream. lol