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“Can't believe you actually smooched that Spider Princess, ha!”
“Yes, very funny,” DBK said, gritting his teeth.
For every drinking session, the Monkey King would get on his nerves at least once, and it looked like this time had come. A shame that it was, as he had found it to have been such a nice night thus far, pleasantly warm and quiet, spent drinking with his two closest friends under the stars shining in the clear skies, atop one of the smaller peaks that made up Flower Fruit Mountain. It had been so perfect, he had almost believed that Wukong would forget to be annoying.
Alas.
“Why would you even smooch her, huh?" Wukong continued, still amused. "What's-What's the deal with all 'at?”
“Because she had led me to believe that...” DBK trailed off, scrunching his eyes closed, gripping his jug so hard it broke apart.
Just like his heart had.
“Ah, what the dunk! Hang on buddy, Imma get you a new one-” Wukong tried to stand up, but fell back on his butt. He groaned and, after ripping out a strand of hair, shouted, “Yo! Bring in another one of these for Beefy, 'kay?”
“Would you quit calling me that already?” DBK snapped.
Wukong laughed. “Nah, it's funny t'see you get all mad, you make the best faces!”
DBK grumbled, trying his best to ignore any attempts Wukong made to get more of a rise out of him.
Taking the new jug that Wukong's clone had brought him before it had poofed, he washed away the bitter taste of disappointment that these past few days had been with the mediocre wine that these monkeys enjoyed in excess.
And with some hope, Wukong was too out of it to go back on the topic he had brought up. However, even when addled, his mind could sometimes stay strangely sharp.
“So,” Wukong said, gulping down the remainder of his own jug and letting out an undignified burp. “What's she got you believing in? Getting a super cool weapon? A super strong spell? A-”
DBK sighed. “Love.”
“Whuh? Love?”
“Yes, love. She... led me on. Made me believe that we could... That I'd finally found someone to share my life, my throne with. I was foolish enough to fall into her trap, enough to...”
“Smooch her?”
“Yes. That.”
Wukong fell quiet. Never a good sign.
“Say, what's that feel like?”
“What? Betrayal? Disappointment? Heartbreak?”
“Nah, smooching, ya dummy. People do it and I jus'... I don't get it, y'know?”
“As with many things,” DBK mocked. “And I sure hope you're not about to ask me to demonstrate.”
“Pshht, nah! I wouldn't smooch ya!” Wukong laughed with floppy dismissive gestures. “But like, is it good or something? She tried to kiss me too, you know?”
DBK ground his teeth, recalling the moment that had him realize he had been played for a fool.
“I know.”
“But... I dunno if I'd have liked it.”
“It's... mostly enjoyable with someone you love.”
Until they pull the rug out from under you, at least.
“...Huh.”
With alarm, DBK noticed that Wukong was staring at him, and his lips. But before DBK could put an end to that dangerous trail of thoughts himself, Wukong made a face, recoiling from his own idea.
“Eugh. You sure? I mean, I love you, like, a lot, but I really don't see myself doing that.” He paused, a pensive pout on his lips. “Hang on, I told you that already, right? That I wouldn't smooch your lil' mouth?”
“You… did.”
Odd as it was, Wukong's admission had DBK feel lighter. At least he could count on his friends to appreciate him, as annoying as they could be.
“Oh! Good, good.” Wukong nodded as sagely as a drunk could. “Don't take it too hard, okay?”
“Trust me. I'm not.”
"Then all's good right? Stop beatin' yourself up 'bout that mean spider. Let loose, brother!"
This time, DBK laughed along with him.
They talked about their previous adventures, and started wondering about the places they had not gone to yet, making plans on the spot, that would no doubt be forgotten come morning. Wukong sent out another clone for refreshments, and they drank again.
There was a beat of precious silence, broken right after Wukong had slammed his newest drink. He looked serious all of a sudden, something on his mind.
"Macaque."
DBK followed his gaze, wondering what exactly that idiot of a monkey was about to get up to.
After having made the foolish decision to try and beat DBK in an improvised drinking competition, Macaque was sprawled against a nearby rock, letting out surprisingly loud snores for the puny thing that he was, drool making its slow descent down his chin.
“What about him?” he asked Wukong with some warranted wariness.
“I wanna kiss him.”
DBK was glad he had not been taking a swig of his wine, else he'd have spit it out. Mediocre alcohol was still alcohol, and he would have hated to waste it.
"Wukong, what-"
But it was already in motion, Wukong motivated enough to get up and stay somewhat upright, the picture of drunk determination as he grinned, a shine in the haze of his eyes.
He really wanted this.
"I'm gonna kiss him."
DBK took another swig out of his jug, half-concerned, half-interested about what would unfold before his very eyes.
After falling on his butt many times, Wukong finally made it to Macaque, falling forward and barely managing to avoid landing right on top of him. He giggled to himself and, with the hand that was not being used to hold himself up, poked Macaque's face.
“Hey, bud, hey, wake up.”
Blinking his eyes open with much difficulty, batting Wukong's hand away and slurring his words, Macaque asked, “Wu...? What's goin' on?”
“I'm gonna smooch ya. On the mouth. You ready?”
Macaque squinted his eyes at Wukong, but his face remained impassive. "Yeah?”
“Great!”
To DBK's surprise, Macaque was the one to take the lead, leaning up to reach Wukong's face.
Their lips met for a fleeting moment, barely a brush.
Wukong was stunned, his mouth opening wide, while Macaque slumped back onto the rock and giggled, his face redder than usual, and not only with the flush of alcohol.
“There you go, Your Majesty.”
Wukong pouted. “That wasn't a kiss!”
“Sure it was. Now you've won that bet.”
“What bet?”
“With DBK? Or was it a dare?”
“What? No! I just wanna kiss you!”
“... Me?”
“Yeah, you! And I'm gonna do it!”
Macaque yawned. “'Kay.”
With a beaming smile, Wukong leaned down. Their lips met again, Wukong putting in a lot more intent and confidence in that kiss than Macaque had.
But it was cut just as short when Macaque pushed Wukong off him, scrambling away, his eyes wide open.
“What the heck?!”
“What's wrong?”
“Why did you kiss me?!”
“I told you I would!" Wukong said, throwing his arms up in air, uncoordinated as that move ended up being. "You were okay with it!”
“I thought you'd-I didn't think you'd-on the mouth?!”
"Yes? Like you just did before? So what's the problem?"
"I thought you were joking, Wukong! Since when do you kiss me on the mouth?"
"Huh, since tonight, apparently?"
Macaque blinked owlishly at Wukong. "You…"
He started laughing, bringing a hand up to his flushed face, covering his eyes.
"I… Fine, sure, whatever."
"So I can kiss you again, right?"
"Right."
For someone who could barely keep himself from sputtering and becoming a blushing mess anytime DBK would strongly tease him about his far-from-platonic feelings for Wukong, Macaque was holding his own quite well. Never had it been truer that alcohol was liquid courage.
Truth be told, drunk or not, DBK had to give it to Macaque for keeping his cool. He was not sure he could have been able to do the same in his position, with a beauty asking to kiss him so forwardly.
In fact, he had not. Many times over.
The latest one still stung, the vivid pain of his broken heart brought back with a vengeance as he watched his two friends go in for third kiss. This time, both of them leaned in, their lips meeting seamlessly, their tender touch lasting far longer than it had for the first two tries.
The look of astounded wonder in Wukong's eyes once they had finally parted from each other was one that DBK did not like.
“DBK!" he exclaimed, grinning at him. "Bro, you were right! This feels amazing!”
"That's nice," DBK said, trying to swallow down the bitterness that had not come from his drink. "Now that you've tried it, you should-"
"Do it again!" Wukong yelled, his shining eyes locking onto Macaque. "This was incredible, I wanna kiss you more!"
This time, Macaque did show his hesitance, but Wukong left him no time to chicken out. Already, he had captured his lips in an insistent kiss, testing out a different way to go about it.
With a tentative eagerness, Macaque responded to his experiment, moving his lips against his to keep the kiss new with each angle that Wukong tried.
Macaque smiled, the kiss breaking from this action. He opened his mouth on a delighted laugh, one that was swallowed by Wukong as he went for it again, for their most daring kiss yet, Macaque deepening it as he threw his arms around Wukong, pulling him down in his embrace.
DBK was not exactly surprised that Macaque was enjoying this: as much as he kept to the shadows, his love shone bright, easy for all to see except for the object of his affections, who must have been too used to its light.
But he had not expected Wukong to be the opposite, his love like a dormant thing that had suddenly erupted, not unlike one of the many volcanoes surrounding Flower Fruit Mountain.
They were infuriatingly perfect for each other in that sense, complementary in this and in so many other ways. It made DBK feel lovesick, longing once more for a relationship that he could not find, no matter how much he tried.
Feeling depressed, he tried to tune them out, drowning the sound of their kissing in the flow of his drink. But soon enough he had emptied out this jug and heard their voices, their breathing quick and heavy with wonder and excitement.
“You're really a peach, you know?” Wukong said in the most adoring voice.
“So you keep saying.”
“Because it's true! I can't get enough of you.”
”That so, huh? Then why don't you have another taste?”
DBK could hear the grin in Wukong's voice as he softly said, “Don't mind if I do.”
He decided right then and there that he absolutely hated their drunk flirtations, and felt under his skin the need to get away from the scene.
He threw the jug away, stood up with the help of a nearby tree, dusting himself off once he had found enough footing to stay balanced and not risk falling flat right on his face.
However, he could not resist to chance a look at them.
And there they were, linked through their loving stares, not a single space left where they could touch, as if they were trying to meld their bodies and souls. Their mouths came together, over and over again with the same fervor and joy, made that much more sincere with the filters alcohol and tiredness had washed away.
When their mouths were not busy with kisses, it was with soft words, whispered into each other's ears, making the other blush or giggle. Their wandering hands or tails found each other, entangling themselves and not letting go.
They were in love. Nobody could ever doubt it, not when seeing them like this.
But there was the double-edged sword that was an intoxicated mind: the heart would take the lead with its secret knowledge of feelings and act on them, even when its host was not yet ready to take that leap, if ever.
And although their embrace stayed chaste as their kisses deepened, there was no telling where this would go if DBK left them without supervision.
Simply put, they were not in their right mind, and he did not want to deal with whatever awkward drama would come from that should they still be able to recall what had happened come morning.
His choice made, he groaned in exasperation and took a few, loud steps toward them. Once they were in reach, he took them both by their scarves, lifting them up and slinging them over his shoulders.
"Hey, whu-what gives DBK?!" Wukong complained, punching down on DBK's back like a fussy child and making him wince.
Macaque voiced no complaints, making DBK fear that tendrils of darkness would coil around his legs and make him trip in retaliation. But nothing happened, and for good reason: Macaque let out his loudest snore yet.
"Bedtime, simian," DBK grunted out as Wukong kept on trying to wrestle himself out of his hold.
"I don't wanna!"
DBK rolled his eyes at Wukong's immature display, as well as his pathetic struggle for freedom. In this state, his strength was as admirable as ever, but his lack of coordination hindered him tremendously.
"Too bad. We're all very tired."
Macaque snored again, proving his point. Wukong finally shut his mouth then, but not before blowing a raspberry, and whacked DBK with his tail up until he also fell asleep.
*
DBK had risen long after the sun had, cursing its light the moment he had stepped out of Water-Curtain Cave. He went down the mountain to the beach, seeking a spot with shade, where he could fish in peace.
There was nothing like it when dealing with a hangover; staying idle but productive near the water helped distract him from his dry mouth and migraine, the soft splashing sounds in the quiet giving him respite.
He had yet to have caught a single fish, in spite of numerous opportunities, when he felt movement behind him. Out of nowhere, someone had appeared in the darkest part of the rocky alcove he had found refuge in. His instincts had him on edge, but he reigned them in, knowing he was not in the presence of a threat.
"Yo, how's it going DBK?"
"Macaque. I'm surprised to see you standing."
Said monkey let out a pained groan. "You and me both."
Steps, coming closer. Macaque appeared in the corner of DBK's eyes, looking worse than usual. He stopped, his back against the stone, already squinting at the dim light as he was, arms crossed and his nose turned up in distaste at the world for its brightness.
DBK could relate, but stopped paying him any mind, focusing back on his line. Unfortunately, there were no fishes in sight yet.
"…Caught anything?"
"No."
"Still not using a net?"
"It detracts from the challenge," DBK explained. "Not everyone looks for the path of least resistance."
Macaque shrugged. "Suit yourself."
There was a pregnant pause, Macaque's tail swinging idly as he rubbed at the ground under his feet, displacing sand and pebbles, slowly getting on DBK's nerves.
But before DBK could snap and demand he get to the point, Macaque spoke.
“So, hey... Did anything... strange, happen last night?”
“Other than you being more foolish than your King and passing out? No.”
“Oh.” Macaque crossed his arms, hiding half of his face into his scarf. “Oh, um, cool. Cool cool cool.”
In any other circumstances, DBK would have left the conversation at that. But he was feeling nosy, and curious to see how much Macaque remembered from last night.
“Why do you ask?”
"I just thought I heard something... unusual?" Macaque said, leaning his head back against the stone. "My powers must not be working right, then. I guess the alcohol messed with my mind.”
“In more ways than one. Don't try to one-up me next time.”
“Duly noted,” Macaque said with a soft smile, though it failed to hide his disappointment. DBK did not need to guess what he had heard while listening for the past to recall missing memories.
DBK counted his blessings for that blackout having happened.
"By the way, if you catch anything you're gonna have to cook it yourself," Macaque said, "I think Wukong's gonna be out for the count all day."
"As usual," DBK said with a smirk. It was always amusing how excessive drinking could defeat such a force of nature. Somewhat reassuring, too.
"I guess I'll be off?" Macaque said, not moving an inch. "…Unless you need some company?"
DBK thought it over, frowning at Macaque in suspicion.
"You're not going to scare the fish away this time, are you?"
"I won't. Wukong's not here," Macaque said, fully taking the unspoken invitation and sitting down next to DBK.
"I admire your ability to pick your battles."
"I just don't have a death wish."
DBK huffed out a laugh. He may not have been as close to Macaque as he was to Wukong, as the latter was a lot easier to understand and befriend, eager as they both were to throw down and prove their strength at any given moment, but there was no way DBK would ever deny to himself that he enjoyed Macaque's company: his presence was more than welcome when dealing with matters that would elude Wukong's abilities.
So far, love had been one of these.
"You're still upset about the Spider Princess thing," Macaque remarked, a simple observation.
"Why wouldn't I be?" DBK grumbled, holding tighter onto his fishing pole.
Macaque hummed, looking down at the gentle waves.
"Hey. Plenty of fishes in the sea, right?"
DBK sighed. "I've yet to catch one, remember?"
"A strong demon like you, with a cushy throne in the Netherworld? One day, you'll get yourself a proper Queen, expand your kingdom, be a dad..."
And how ardently did DBK wish for that, to have a fierce and beautiful wife by his side, supporting him in his conquests, having his back in a battle, and helping him raise a child worthy of the Demon Bull family's renown.
He looked forward to that future more than anything else.
"What makes you so sure I'd ever get the life I desire?" he asked.
Macaque stayed silent, evasive as he was when trying to hide something he did not want people to know. DBK briefly wondered if he had the ability to listen to the future as well as the past and the present, but he shoved that thought away.
Surely, if he had such a powerful and useful gift, either him or Wukong would have brought it up.
"Tell you what," Macaque eventually said, "Next time you find yourself in love? I'll help you out."
DBK was surprised by this offer. Touched, too. And feeling a little bad, a rare occurrence for him.
He hesitated on telling Macaque about what had happened during the night, but he was nothing if not a selfish demon at heart, and feared the future in which his two closest friends would neglect their old bonds of friendship in favor of their own blossoming romance.
He could not have that. Not while still dealing with a fresh bruise on his heart.
He let no signs of his inner battle show, and said, "In that case, I'll have to repay you."
"And I'll hold you up to that."
"I don't doubt you will, you rat."
Macaque laughed, DBK joining him, caring little that their laughter might make the fishes go away.
Wukong eventually showed up in the evening, looking the worst out of the three of them. In spite of his state, he helped them bring back the fish they had caught: they had plenty, enough for a feast, courtesy of Macaque casting a net of shadows. DBK had contributed, his catches less impressive by his numbers but by the skill they had taken him.
This was how they decided to spend one last night together, free from copious amount of alcohol. In the morning, DBK would have to go back to the Netherworld to perform his duties and continue his studies as reigning monarch of his family's kindgom.
As he ate, he stared at Wukong and Macaque, bickering about who could get one specific fish, one arguing that the other should let his King have it, the other arguing that the fish belonged to the one who had fished it out of the water. But even as they argued, their eyes were shining with mirth and tenderness, smiles playing at their lips.
No one could deny their closeness, nor the undeniable pull and chemistry they had, even with alcohol out of the picture.
So what harm could there ever be in delaying what was inevitable? With how strong their romantic feelings clearly appeared to be, they would surely get together somewhere down the line, becoming a thousand times more insufferable to deal with than they already were.
And maybe, in a way, DBK was looking forward to that future as well.