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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “You know, one day you’re gonna meet someone you love so much you’ll want to toss all your stupid rules out the window just to be around them,” Jessica told him the day they broke up.

    God, Shane remembers thinking. I fucking hope not.

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    13 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    On the screen was perhaps the most confusing headline Shane had seen in all his years in the spotlight.

    ‘Is Montreal’s Shane Hollander Having an Illicit Love Affair with Boston’s Cliff Marlow?’

    Shane blinked twice, his mind slamming to a halt as he read and re-read the words. “What the fuck?”

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    13 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    troybarrett if u can read this im free on thurs @censational · Oct 23, 2022
    Ilya Rozanov getting cancelled for having an Asian fetish was NOT on my 2022 bingo but here we are #ilyarozanovisoverparty

    kari ˚⟡˖ ࣪ @pikesplacee · Oct 23, 2022
    the question of “why shane hollander of all players” finally makes sense now I guess… #ilyarozanovisoverparty

    vi @mooncatvi · Oct 23, 2022
    you mean the hockey player I liked isn't a good person? 🥺 you mean the stripper doesn't love me? 🥺 #ilyarozanovisoverparty

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    13 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    In which Shane Hollander's pubic hair goes viral, the internet colour-matches it to Pantone 15-1214 (Warm Sand), and Ilya Rozanov - creates accounts on Reddit, TikTok, Instagram, Tumblr, AND YouTube to anonymously defend his not-boyfriend's crotch using genetics Wikipedia and advanced hockey analytics.

    Features: a one-star Calvin Klein review ("very poor elastic, ruined my life"), Svetlana and Rose who have never once been wrong, and the most romantic use of the word "melanocytes" in the history of the English language according to Ilya Rozanov.

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    12 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya: He should buy lottery tickets because he is the luckiest man on earth 
    Ilya: He should get on his knees and thank god everyday that he got to fuck you
    Shane: Oh my God stop
    Ilya: What? I do that

    Or: The man who topped Shane in Mexico posts about his experience, Ilya contemplates murder, and the other queer NHL players get caught in the crossfire.

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    12 Mar 2026