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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “So,” Five continued matter-of-factly, “you’re in a cramped, human sized box, in a graveyard where you can’t see light or hear sounds. What are the odds that you’re above ground?”

    Diego blinked. He thought he’d been smelling the iron of his blood pooling and drying under his head but it was humid in here, and musty.

    “Fuck,” Diego said.

     

    Diego and Klaus are buried alive together.

    Language:
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    26 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “You’re asking five 13-year-old boys not to jerk off for – it can’t be done,” Luther says. “Now that we’re older, it would be different, but back then –”

    “Excuse me, I could do it,” Five says. “I could certainly outlast all of you.”

    They all look at each other.

    “Oh, no,” says Allison.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,898
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    5,222
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    25 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 75

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    “Married witches?” the man repeats it with raised brows, a mystified look on his face. “You’re a Watchful Eye that is married? I'm... that’s - new, for me."

    or

    Five times Olruggio jokes (and lies) that he’s married and has kids to (dodge) people (mostly his clients), and that one time he [redacted].

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,950
    Chapters:
    5/6
    Comments:
    51
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    520
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    75
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    22 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Yaga levels them all with a look. "You're being reassigned."

    Shoko sighs. Oh boy.

    Twin scrapes can be heard as Satoru and Suguru leap up, voices overlapping in protest.

    or, Satoru and Suguru get separate assignments; this is widely considered a bad move

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,773
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    265
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    08 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are Geto Suguru.” Satoru continued with a burning intensity. “Your favourite food is zaru soba but you used to buy sweets just because I like them. You're better than me at martial arts and the first time we met, we fought. You got this scar on your chin from it. I have one on my forearm. You never liked your father. You have trouble sleeping. You hate my taste in music. I haven’t met a better listener than you no matter how much time goes past. You are kind, beneath it all, even if you think you aren’t.”

    Something stirred in Kenjaku's carefully critical expression, but the words bled out of Satoru like they had sat beneath his skin for years. Perhaps they had. “You are Geto Suguru, and you are my friend, and you never stopped being my friend. You are Geto Suguru, and you are strong enough to overcome this."

    OR,

    sometimes you need to torment an ancient sorcerer with videos of your insufferable youth in order to get your dead ex back. it happens.

    Language:
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    1/1
    Comments:
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    08 Feb 2026