Chapter Text
Akechi Goro was going to die.
He was cornered, his back against the bulkhead, and had a gun pressed hard under his chin. The facial features of his assailant didn’t look remotely human anymore – they were more akin to a beast, or even some kind of monster; his eyes empty and yet, brimming with malevolence and menace. The sight alone was already unsettling enough, but this was Goro’s own face. Finding out it was physically capable of being distorted that way was enough to send a chill down his spine.
Still, Goro didn’t cower. His hand never shook while he pointed his own firearm at his double’s forehead.
“How does it feel? How does it feel to know you’re about to die?” the entity asked with a demented smile, clearly enjoying the situation. He didn’t seem fazed by the gun aimed at his head at all, as if he were certain he was in no danger whatsoever.
Goro didn’t answer. He refused to give in to the taunts of the impostor. He felt this was exactly what the being wanted, and Goro was done doing everything that was expected of him like a brainless puppet, whose actions were always dictated and manipulated. The ultimate proof of his status as a puppet was standing before him, after all – this Akechi Goro, a cold-blooded, obedient and disposable little hitman, born from the perception of his father’s mind, was going to kill him. But the real Goro refused to go down without a fight: if he was going to die, he would make sure to take out the other with him.
From behind the bulkhead rang out muffled sounds of rushing footsteps and interrupted his line of thought: the telltale sign of a large group of people running away from imminent danger. The impostor’s smile widened, and his eyes gleamed with even deeper malice.
“Look, they abandoned you. Well, it’s only natural… You’re already dead.”
Goro gritted his teeth, hard. He knew that was a lie but even so, the mere allusion to the Phantom Thieves of Hearts was enough to twist a tight knot within his chest. In his mind’s eye, he reenacted the past hour, the last sixty minutes of his short life, the sixty minutes that had turned his life upside down for good. It was painful to admit and yet, he did suffer not one but two crushing defeats at the hands of the Thieves. He was hurting all over, he was even slightly bleeding, he was exhausted, and above all, he felt humiliated. He had disliked being backed into such a vulnerable position that his emotions would be exposed for the whole gang to see. He had disliked that they tried to soothe him. He had disliked that they found out about his deeply hidden affection for Amamiya Ren, and he had disliked how they tried to convince him to join the group again for the ultimate battle against Shido Masayoshi. He believed that what happened between Shido and himself was personal, and he didn’t want the Phantom Thieves to get involved.
No, that’s wrong, came Goro’s cutting thought. He had to stop lying to himself: the true reason for his reluctance to join the Phantom Thieves was because he felt like he didn’t have the right to accept their offer. He had lied to them, he had murdered two of their parents, he had sold them out, he had stabbed them in the back, he had tried to kill their leader, he had tried to kill them all. And despite that, they had been willing to let him join them again? Did their foolishness know no bounds?
Goro couldn’t help but let out a groan. Those people were beyond his understanding.
Even so, he didn’t get the opportunity to give them an answer in the end. The fake Goro – Shido’s hitman – had appeared with dozens of Shadows as reinforcements, and now that the real one had assisted the Phantom Thieves in their escape, his time was up. The two figures were standing still, prepared to strike any moment now, their faces so close to each other that Goro could see his reflection in those empty, monstrous eyes. His own gaze didn’t betray any hint of fear, however. His grip around his weapon tightened, and he stared at his double with pure hatred, ready to kill. This only made the being laugh.
“You know it’s useless to shoot me, right? Kill me… and someone else will replace me. I’m disposable, after all.”
Shido’s hitman was now pressing his gun harder under Goro’s chin, as if intending to leave a bruise. He opened his mouth to let out a demented laugh, and that was when Goro knew this was the end. He thought about those past two and a half years, he thought about Shido, he thought about the Phantom Thieves, he thought about Joker. Then, everything happened too fast.
With his right hand, he shoved the double away and, not taking the time to think or aim properly, pressed the trigger and squeezed his eyes shut, bracing himself for his imminent death. He could tell the impostor had been caught off-guard, but a loud gunshot still went off a split second later, accompanied by a scream of rage that resonated across the entire room.
Seconds passed.
The echo eventually quieted down.
Slowly, cautiously, Goro opened his eyes – and couldn’t help a gasp.
Sprawled on the floor was Shido’s hitman, eyes wide open, blood dripping from his head and tinting his face a vivid, sickening shade of crimson; he would never talk or taunt anymore. Goro stared, unable to tear his gaze away, a powerful and morbid trance holding him in place. It lifted the moment the body vanished into thin air, alongside the Shadows the double had summoned in preparation of the aborted bloodbath. Moments went by before Goro finally let every last of his muscles relax, only now realizing how tense his entire body had been. As the adrenaline receded, his self-awareness seemed to skyrocket: he was violently shaking, his breathing irregular, and every inch of his skin drenched in sweat. Then, without warning, his legs gave out under his weight and he collapsed to his knees.
Panting heavily, Goro cast a glance over his shoulder at the bulkhead, now riddled with a bullet hole; much too close to his body. Thanks to his shove, the double’s aim had been thrown off, he realized wryly – one more inch to the left and he would have dropped dead. It was way, way too close; but now, he was no longer in danger. He was safe.
He should have died.
But he lived…
Goro didn’t understand. Something felt wrong, as if he had been supposed to die here. His survival was a mistake, or so he believed – an unshakeable conviction that left him very much confused. But before he could do more than blink his puzzlement, a disembodied voice echoed throughout the room, snapping him back to reality.
“Attention. The watertight bulkhead has closed. All personnel beyond, evacuate at once.”
Goro inhaled, then released a long, deep exhale. It was the same announcement he had heard when he shot the switch that raised the bulkhead, separating the Phantom Thieves from the Shadows, the impostor, and himself. So much for being safe; he didn’t know exactly what was going to happen, but it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. Yet, he didn’t want to think anymore. He felt too tired, as if he hadn’t rested in a lifetime. All he wanted to do… was sleep.
Slowly, he lay down on the hard floor, his movements stiff from his numerous injuries – that gash on his cheek had been courtesy of Sakamoto. In any other circumstances, he would have stuck out his nose in contempt at any memory of the Phantom Thieves; now, the final words he exchanged with them were all that resurfaced from the depths of his mind.
“Change Shido’s heart… in my stead… End his crimes… Please…!”
Goro had heard him. He had heard Joker accept his final wish behind the wall.
Lying on his back and staring at the high ceiling without seeing it, Goro frowned. He didn’t know what to feel anymore. He felt torn between confusion, resentment, jealousy, envy, but also gratefulness, emptiness, sadness and regret – a contradictory cocktail of emotions that made his head spin. He hated the Phantom Thieves, but also liked them. He looked down on them, but also desperately craved for their acceptance. And in the end, he had been accepted… somewhat. If only the fake Goro hadn’t appeared… perhaps he would have ended up joining them after all.
The memory of Joker’s widening eyes as the bulkhead rose seemed burned into his mind. It was a look of deep anguish and anxiety, as if Joker had been truly worried about him, and Goro’s lips curled into an imperceptible smile. No matter how much he wanted to deny it, the thought that Joker – no, Amamiya Ren – had apparently felt this way made him happy. He wouldn’t ask for more.
A huge vibration yanked him out of his brief peace of mind. The engine room was suddenly overcome by great quakes, making it plain that something was happening to the ship. Sounds of explosions could be heard in the distance, but before Goro could focus on them, his heart gave a giant jolt – the room slowly but surely swung upward, like a cube rolling to another side in slow-motion. Was the ship sinking?
The way Goro’s body moved on its own, pulled down by gravity and sliding along the wall that once was a floor, suggested that yes, it was. The room had now completely tipped over, threatening to tear in half if the ominous creak of stressed metal against high-pressuring water was anything to go by. Goro wasn’t sure what was going on, but if he had to guess, he would say the Phantom Thieves somehow managed to reform Shido, which in turn resulted in the collapse of his Palace. Those people truly were something else, he caught himself thinking. A tiny part of him worried they might be in danger, but he discarded the thought as soon as it crossed his mind – they had been through worse; he knew they would be fine and escape safely.
An involuntary, minuscule smile flickered across his lips at this, though it didn’t take long to fade away: knowing the Phantom Thieves kept their promise made him feel at peace… but also empty, he realized. His purpose had been fulfilled, meaning he now had nothing worth living for anymore. How could a murderer, a liar and a cheater keep on living, anyway? He had survived his encounter with his impostor, but a strong part of him was firmly convinced he hadn’t deserved this chance. Why had someone like him, of all people, been somehow lucky enough to cheat death, while many had been mercilessly murdered by his own hand? Where was the justice in that?
Goro was tired of it all. But now, he was finally about to get his own escape. All he had to do was close his eyes and wait.
Another explosion rang out nearby, the shockwave as loud as it was close. The engine room was shaking hard, just like a plane experiencing heavy turbulence, forcing Goro to hold on to a row of steam pipes as tightly as he could. It was among this catastrophe that Amamiya made his way into his thoughts again. Why had Goro been intrigued by him…?
As if to answer, bite-sized pieces of that day, a day that happened more than five months ago now, rose little by little to the surface of his mind. That’s right… He had approached him after that one talk-show because Amamiya had spoken in favor of the Phantom Thieves. Goro was not used to people going against him during discussions and debates, and that is why he had taken an interest in him. He had met him several times after that, curiosity slowly turning into resentment, then jealousy, then pure hatred. He had been envious of Amamiya’s ability to be surrounded by people who genuinely cared about him in spite of his tainted reputation. It seemed to him that Amamiya possessed the extraordinary power to illuminate the lives of all the people he encountered, and very deep down, Goro felt that his own life too could have been illuminated – no, saved – by Amamiya… if only he hadn’t been so obsessed with his plan. He had been completely blinded by his desire for revenge and approval, and he was now about to pay the ultimate price.
But it’s all right… This is what I wanted…
Goro blinked, slowly. Only now did he register the blaring of the emergency siren against his eardrums; red beacons mounted upon the walls rotated ominously at an absurd pace.
Huh…? I wanted… this?
No. If Goro was honest, the thing he wanted the most was to have met Amamiya years earlier, before he got entangled in this whole mess. He had no one to blame but himself, however – he chose to put himself in this situation, after all – but it never even began to cross his mind that said situation could have spun out of control so badly.
Even so, he didn’t care anymore, because nothing mattered anymore. Goro finally closed his eyes and waited, actually longing for death now. This is what he deserved, he figured… not to mention his only hope for liberation.
Are you really going to let yourself die, even though you were lucky enough to finally escape death? Are you a coward?
Eyes opening wide, Goro gasped and sat up straight, his heart a sudden drum against his ribs. His movement, much too brisk, jostled his wounds to the point he couldn’t help a yelp of pain. As he groaned and clutched his side, his mind was struggling to understand what in the world was that about. He was almost certain he had just heard an unknown woman’s voice inside his head, barely louder than a whisper, yet very much forceful all the same. A furrow creasing his brow, he pricked up his ears in anticipation, but the creaking of metal – it was only a matter of minutes before the walls finally gave out – and the deafening ringing of the emergency siren were all he could hear. Perhaps the turmoil of his final moments, starting with Shido’s phone call and ending with yet another explosion in the distance, was getting to him at last. That voice – he probably misheard it, or his imagination might be playing tricks on him. There was no other explanation—
Live to see another day.
It was like a jolt of electricity hit him head on. He would have probably jumped up to the ceiling if he had been able.
“Wh-What?! Who’s there?!” he cried out, frantically darting his sight around in search of the voice’s owner, to no avail. He was completely alone.
But then, before he could even begin to realize what was going on, the floor collapsed under his body and Goro found himself falling in a black, endless void. He screamed, screamed and screamed some more, until his voice broke. And at long last, he crashed into freezing water and sank, feeling too weak to swim back to the surface. He clasped his hands hard against his mouth, but it was far too late. The cold water rushed through his nose, throat and lungs, and Goro stopped thinking.